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Wilson talking — "I am filled with an irresistible urge to do science."

“I am one heck of a scientist.”

This page lists Wilson's Quotes which are spoken when the player examines an in-game item or object. The player can alt-click items and objects to examine them.

Wilson

Tools

Base Game

Axe- "It's my trusty axe."
Luxury Axe- "That's one fancy axe."
Shovel- "There's a lot going on underground."
Regal Shovel- "I can't wait to dig holes."
Pickaxe- "Iconic, isn't it?"
Opulent Pickaxe- "Hey, isn't gold really soft?"
Razor- "A sharpened rock tied to a stick. Hygienic!"
Hammer- "Stop! It's time! To hammer things!"
Pitchfork- "Maxwell might be looking for this."
Feather Pencil- "The feather increases the scientific properties of the writing."
Brush- "I bet the beefalo really like this."
Saddle- "That'll allow the mounting of some smelly animal."
War Saddle- "The only problem is the saddle sores."
Glossamer Saddle- "This saddle really flies!"
Saddlehorn- "This could take a saddle off."
Salt Lick (normal, burning, and burnt)- "How many licks does it take to get to the center?"

Shipwrecked

Machete- "I like the cut of this blade."
Luxury Machete- "Hack in style!"

Hamlet

Shears- "Shearly delightful."

Don't Starve Together

Axe- "A trusty axe."
Pitchfork- "Now I just need an angry mob to join."
Pocket Scale- "A scaled-down weighing device."

Lights

Base Game

Campfire and Fire Pit (upon being built)- "Sure beats darkness."
Campfire (high)- "That fire is getting out of hand!"
Fire Pit (high)- "Good thing it's contained!"
Campfire and Fire Pit (normal)- "Nice and comfy."
Campfire and Fire Pit (low)- "The fire's getting a bit low."
Campfire and Fire Pit (embers)- "I should put something on the fire before it goes out."
Campfire (out)- "Well, that's over."
Fire Pit (out)- "At least I can start it up again."
Torch- "Something to hold back the night."
Miner Hat- "This will keep my hands free."
Pumpkin Lantern- "Spooky!"
Lantern- "A more civilized light."

Reign of Giants

Endothermic Fire and Fire Pit- "Sure beats darkness."
Endothermic Fire (high)- "That fire is getting out of hand!"
Endothermic Fire Pit (high)- "Good thing it's contained!"
Endothermic Fire and Fire Pit (normal)- "Nice and comfy."
Endothermic Fire and Fire Pit (low)- "The fire's getting a bit low."
Endothermic Fire and Fire Pit (embers)- "I should put something on the fire before it goes out."
Endothermic Fire (out)- "Well, that's over."
Endothermic Fire Pit (out)- "At least I can start it up again."
Moggles- "A wretched stench but excellent visibility."

Shipwrecked

Chiminea (all stages)- "Take that, wind!"
Bottle Lantern- "A bottle full of sunshine."
Boat Torch- "This'll keep my hands free."
Boat Lantern- "This will do wonders for my night-vision!"
Obsidian Fire Pit (upon being built)- "This fire pit is a conductor for even more... fire."
Obsidian Fire Pit (high)- "Good thing it's contained!"
Obsidian Fire Pit (normal)- "This is my best invention yet."
Obsidian Fire Pit (low)- "The fire's getting a bit low."
Obsidian Fire Pit (embers)- "I should put something on the fire before it goes out."
Obsidian Fire Pit (out)- "At least I can start it up again.
Tar Lamp- "That's a real slick lamp."
Buoyant Chiminea (upon being built)- "Science protects my fires out here."
Buoyant Chiminea (high)- "I'm glad we're surrounded by water."
Buoyant Chiminea (normal)-"As cozy as it gets."
Buoyant Chiminea (low)- "It's getting low."
Buoyant Chiminea (embers)- "Better put something on it before it goes out."
Buoyant Chiminea (out)- "It finally went out."

Hamlet

Cork Candle Hat- "What a bright idea!"
Cowl- "A hat, made of bat."

Don't Starve Together

Campfire and Endothermic Fire (embers)- "That fire needs more fuel or it's going to go out."
Miner Hat- "A hands-free way to brighten your day."
Mushlight (off)- "It's a big, science-y 'shroom."
Mushlight (on)- "Science makes it light up."
Mushlight (burnt)- "Comboletely burnt."
Glowcap (off)- "We could make a prime light source with some primary colors."
Glowcap (on)- "Blue is obviously the most scientific color."
Glowcap (burnt)- "I didn't mildew it, I swear."
Willow's Lighter- "It's her lucky lighter."

Survival

Base Game

Backpack- "You could fit a whole lot of science in there."
Piggyback- "I feel kinda bad for that."
Bird Trap- "Gives me a net advantage!"
Bug Net- "For catching bugs."
Fishing Rod- "It makes me hungry just to look at it."
Straw Roll- "It smells like wet."
Fur Roll- "It's so warm and comfy."
Tent- "I get sort of crazy when I don't sleep."
Trap- "I wove it real tight."
Honey Poultice- "Seems sterile enough."
Healing Salve- "The stinging means that it's working."
Umbrella- "This will keep my hair dry, at least."
Compass-
- N- "North."
- S- "South."
- E- "East."
- W- "West."
- NE- "Northeast."
- SE- "Southeast."
- NW- "Northwest."
- SW- "Southwest."
Compass (generic)- "Which way am I facing?"
Bundling Wrap- "Wrapping things up should make them easier to carry."
Bundling Wrap (no items, unable to bundle)- "I need to have something to wrap."
Bundled Supplies- "Our supplies are in there!"

Reign of Giants

Insulated Pack- "The fur keeps the temperature inside stable."
Luxury Fan- "Down to bring my temperature down."
Siesta Lean-to- "A nice place for an afternoon rest out of the heat."
Siesta Lean-to (can't sleep)- "Night is for sleeping, not taking siestas."
Siesta Lean-to (monsters)- "It's too dangerous right now!"
Siesta Lean-to (hungry)- "I'm too hungry for a siesta!"
Siesta Lean-to (in cave)- "I don't think I could really relax down here."
Tent (burnt)- "Nothing left to sleep in."
Siesta Lean-to (burnt)- "It won't provide much shade now."
Thermal Stone- "I could manipulate its temperature."
Thermal Stone (frozen)- "It's colder than ice."
Thermal Stone (cold)- "That's a cold stone."
Thermal Stone (warm)- "It's quite warm and cuddly... for a rock!"
Thermal Stone (hot)- "Nice and toasty hot!"
Pretty Parasol- "This will keep my hair moderately dry, at least."

Shipwrecked

Thatch Pack- "I call it a thatchel."
Booty Bag- "I can keep my booty in here."
Sea Sack- "I hate when food has that not-so-fresh taste."
Tropical Fan- "Down to bring my temperature down."
Silly Monkey Ball- "I have a strange desire to name it after myself."
Tropical Parasol- "My hair looks good wet... it's when it dries that's the problem."
Anti Venom- "Tastes horrible!"
Palm Leaf Hut (normal, burning, and burnt)- "Shade, sweet shade."

Hamlet

Bug B'Gone- "Take that, bugs!"
Bird Whistle- "For the birds."

Don't Starve Together

Piggyback- "This little piggy's gone... "home"."
Fishing Rod- "Hook, line and stick!"
Umbrella- "I always hate when my hair gets wet and poofy."
Luxury Fan- "Down, to bring the temperature down."
Pretty Parasol- "My hair looks good wet... it's when it dries that's the problem."
Telltale Heart- "The beating of this hideous heart will bring a ghost back to life!"
Booster Shot- "A scientific breakthrough! The cure!"
Waterballoon- "What a scientific marvel!"
Whirly Fan- "Somehow the breeze comes out the back twice as fast."
Flare- "I can light it to let everyone know I'm here."
Bernie (held and inactive)- "It's all scorched."
Bernie (active)- "That teddy bear is moving around. Interesting."
BERNIE!- "Remind me not to get on Willow's bad side."
Bernie (broken)- "It finally fell apart."
Chef Pouch- "A breakthrough in culinary science!"

Food

Base Game

Crock Pot (empty)- "It makes me hungry just to look at it."
Crock Pot (cooking, long time left)- "This is going to take a while."
Crock Pot (cooking, short time left)- "It's almost done!"
Crock Pot (finished)- "Mmmmm! It's ready to eat!"
Crock Pot (failed to add item)- "That can't go in there."
Bee Box- "Bees!"
Bee Box (no honey)- "It's empty."
Bee Box (some honey)- "I should wait a bit."
Bee Box (full of honey)- "It's full of honey."
Farm- "I should try planting some crops."
Farm (growing)- "Go plants go!"
Farm (finished)- "Mmmm. Ready to harvest."
Farm (needs fertilizer)- "I think it needs to be fertilized."
Ice Box- "I have harnessed the power of cold!"
Drying Rack- "I should dry some meats."
Drying Rack (drying)- "Meat takes a while to dry."
Drying Rack (finished)- "Jerky time!"

Reign of Giants

Crock Pot (burnt)- "The pot got cooked."
Bee Box (burnt)- "How did it get burned?!!"
Basic and Improved Farm (burnt)- "I don't think anything will grow in a pile of ash."
Drying Rack (drying in rain)- "Meat takes even longer to dry in rain."
Drying Rack (burnt)- "The rack got dried."
Bucket-o-poop- "That is definitely a bucket full of poop."

Shipwrecked

Mussel Stick- "I'm really going to stick it to those mussels."
Mussel Bed- "I should find a good spot for these."
Fish Farm (empty)- "I need to find some fish eggs for this."
Fish Farm (growing)- "The fish babies haven't hatched yet."
Fish Farm (one fish)- "There's a fish!"
Fish Farm (two fish)- "The fish are still multiplying."
Fish Farm (three fish)- "This has been a successful fish experiment!"
Fish Farm (four fish)- "I'd better start harvesting these!"

Hamlet

Sprinkler- "Water you think it's for?"

Don't Starve Together

Bee Box (some honey)- "Need to wait a bit."
Mushroom Planter (empty)- "It could use a spore. Or a mushroom transplant."
Mushroom Planter (some)- "It should keep growing now."
Mushroom Planter (lots)- "The mushrooms have really taken to the log."
Mushroom Planter (stuffed)- "That's a lot of mushrooms!"
Mushroom Planter (rotten)- "The log is dead. We should replace it with a live one."
Mushroom Planter (burnt)- "The power of science compelled it."
Mushroom Planter (snow covered)- "I don't think it can grow in this cold."
Portable Crock Pot- "Now we're cookin'!"
Portable Crock Pot (finished)- "Now we're done cookin'!"
Portable Grinding Mill- "It mixes all the food."
Portable Seasoning Station- "This will spice things up."
Portable Seasoning Station (finished)- "Should make things a little tastier."

Science

Base Game

Science Machine- "It breaks down objects into their scientific components."
Alchemy Engine- "It's even more science-y than the last one!"
Thermal Measurer- "I am one heck of a scientist."
Rainometer- "It measures cloudiness."
Lightning Rod- "I can harness the heavens!"
Lightning Rod (charged)- "The power is mine!"
Gunpowder- "It looks like pepper."

Reign of Giants

Science Machine (burnt)- "It won't be doing much science now."
Alchemy Engine (burnt)- "The extra science didn't keep it alive."
Thermal Measurer (burnt)- "Its measuring days are over."
Rainometer (burnt)- "The measuring parts went up in a cloud of smoke."
Ice Flingomatic (off)- "All quiet on the flinging front."
Ice Flingomatic (on)- "Fling on!"
Ice Flingomatic (low fuel)- "The fuel tank is getting a bit low."
Electrical Doodad- "It's whirring with electricity."

Shipwrecked

Sea Lab- "For sea science!"
Ice Maker 3000- "It's putting along!"
Ice Maker 3000 (high)- "It's running great!"
Ice Maker 3000 (medium)- "It's putting along."
Ice Maker 3000 (low)- "It seems to be slowing down."
Ice Maker 3000 (very low)- "I can hear it sputtering."
Ice Maker 3000 (out)- "It needs more fuel."
Quacken Drill- "I can get more tar if I used this at sea."

Hamlet

Smelter- "I smelt that!"
Oscillating Fan- "Fan-tastic."

Don't Starve Together

Thermal Measurer- "Mercurial."
Lightning Rod- "To harness the heavens!"
Cartographer's Desk- "Now I can show everyone what I found!"
Cartographer's Desk (burning)- "So much for that."
Cartographer's Desk (burnt)- "Nothing but ash now."
Potter's Wheel- "We can make stone sculptures with this."
Potter's Wheel (burnt)- "Burnt right down."
Potter's Wheel (invalid material)- "Not even science could make that into a sculpture."
Potter's Wheel (Marble or Cut Stone placed)- "Ready for sculpting."
Potter's Wheel (material already present)- "We already put something there."
Potter's Wheel (sculpture)- "A masterpiece!"
Potter's Wheel (sketch already known)- "We already know that one."
Think Tank- "I think tanks are in order."
Think Tank (burnt)- "The science has been lost to sea."

Exclusive to PS4

Accomploshrine- "I want to use it, and I want the world to know that I did."

Fight

Base Game

Spear- "That's one pointy stick."
Ham Bat- "This seems unsanitary."
Boomerang- "Aerodynamical!"
Boomerang (hit self)- "Ow! I should try to catch that!"
Blow Dart- "Good practice for my birthday cake!"
Sleep Dart- "Just don't breathe in."
Fire Dart- "This seems fundamentally unsafe."
Football Helmet- "I don't like sports."
Grass Suit- "I hope there are no bugs in this."
Log Suit- "That is a perfectly reasonable piece of clothing."
Marble Suit- "This looks really heavy."
Bee Mine- "It buzzes when I shake it."
Tooth Trap- "This is a nasty surprise."

Reign of Giants

Scalemail- "Hot mail!"
Morning Star- "It's electric!"
Weather Pain- "Spinning doom."

Shipwrecked

Poison Spear- "Now it's extra deadly."
Poison Dart- "The pointy end goes that way."
Coconade- "I'll need to light it first."
Coconade (lit)- "This seems dangerous."
Spear Gun (empty), Spear Gun, Poison Spear Gun, Obsidian Spear Gun- "Science takes care of me."
Cutlass Supreme- "I hope this sword doesn't start to smell..."
Horned Helmet- "Nice and dry. This helmet will protect me from the elements."
Seashell Suit- "Arts and crafts!"
Limestone Suit- "I'm sure this will hold up great!"
Cactus Armor- "The best defense is a good offense."

Hamlet

Halberd- "Now I can't be caught off-guard."
Cork Bat- "Put a cork in it."
Weevole Mantle- "Yeesh. This is kinda creepy."
Mant Mask- "There's still some goo stuck to the insides."
Mant Suit- "It's brittle."
Fancy Helmet- "Protects my brains."
Tin Suit- "Science says I'm safe in here."
Blunderbuss- "Well, this will come in handy."

Don't Starve Together

Grass Suit- "Hopefully there aren't any bugs in it."
Bee Mine- "It buzzes when shaken."
Battle Helm- "Pretty fancy hat, that."
Battle Spear- "It feels very stabby."
Electric Dart- "It has shocking accuracy."
Tail o' Three Cats- "Nothing like loud noises to help keep the peace."
Napsack- "It makes snooze circles when I throw it."
Cookie Cutter Cap- "At least my hair will stay dry."

Structures

Base Game

Birdcage- "I should put a bird in it."
Birdcage (occupied)- "That's my bird!"
Birdcage (occupied, sleeping)- "Awwww, he's asleep."
Pig House- "These pigs have pretty fancy houses."
Pig House (occupied, lights on)- "I can see a snout pressed up against the window."
Pig House (occupied, lights off)- "Come ON! I know you're home!"
Rabbit Hutch- "That's not a real carrot."
Hay Wall (held)- "This seems like a bad idea."
Hay Wall- "Hmmmm. I guess that'll have to do."
Wood Wall (held)- "Pickets!"
Wood Wall- "Pointy!"
Stone Wall (held)- "They make me feel so safe."
Stone Wall- "That's a nice wall."
Chest- "It's my tickle trunk!"
Sign- "It says 'You are here'."
Potted Fern- "A fern in a pot."
Mini Sign (held)- "It's not much use like this. We should place it."
Mini Sign (empty)- "We should draw something on there."
Mini Sign (draw with no subject)- "This'd be easier if I had the item in front of me."
Mini Sign (drawn on)- "I could draw better than that!"
Wood Fence (held)- "All we need to build a nice, sturdy fence."
Wood Fence- "It's just a wood fence."
Wood Gate (held)- "All we need to build a nice, sturdy gate."
Wood Gate- "It opens. And closes sometimes, too."

Reign of Giants

Pig House (burnt)- "Not so fancy now, pig!"
Rabbit Hutch (burnt)- "That's not a real roasted carrot."
Hay Wall (burnt)- "That won't do at all."
Wood Wall (burnt)- "Burnt!"
Chest (burnt)- "That trunk was truncated."
Scaled Chest- "Next best thing to a lockbox!"
Sign (burnt)- "I can't read it any longer."

Shipwrecked

Sand Castle- "Look what I made!"
Sand Castle (sand)- "It's a sandcastle, in the sand!"
Wildbore House (normal, burning, and burnt)- "What a bore-ing house."
Prime Ape Hut (normal, burning, and burnt)- "Here be evil."
Limestone Wall (held)- "These would do more good if I placed them."
Limestone Wall- "Sturdy."
Dragoon Den- "Even goons gotta sleep."
Sandbag (held)- "Sand technology on the go."
Sandbag- "Keeps the water at bay."
Seaworthy (Vanilla or ROG world)- "Ahoy!"
Seaworthy (SW world)- "It's broken."
Buoy- "Awww yaaaaa Buoy!"
Sea Chest- "Watertight, just like all my theories."
Ballphin Palace- "The place where the ballphins roost."
Sea Wall (held)- "I have to build it in the water."
Sea Wall- "I shelled out for the good stuff."

Hamlet

Cork Barrel- "Room for two. Or three."
Cork Barrel (burnt)- "

Don't Starve Together

Birdcage- "Now it just needs a bird."
Birdcage (occupied)- "Who's a good bird?"
Chest- "It's a tickle trunk!"
Birdcage (occupied, bird hungry)- "He's looking a bit peckish."
Birdcage (occupied, bird starving)- "Did I forget to feed you?"
Birdcage (occupied, bird dead)- "Maybe he's just resting?"
Birdcage (occupied, bird skeleton)- "That bird is definitely deceased."
Directional Sign- "It says 'Thataway'."
Sign and Directional Sign (empty)- "The sign is currently blank."
Directional Sign (burnt)- "'Don't play with matches.'"
End Table (empty and burning)- "I should put something in there."
End Table (flowers)- "A flower in a vase on a table."
End Table (new light source)- "It's nice to have a little light."
End Table (old light source)- "Did we remember to pick up new bulbs?"
End Table (wilted)- "Not looking too fresh."
End Table (burnt)- "A burnt vase on a burnt table."
Friendly Scarecrow- "All dressed up and no where to crow."
Friendly Scarecrow (burning)- "Someone made that strawman eat crow."
Friendly Scarecrow (burnt)- "Someone MURDERed that scarecrow!"
Moon Rock Wall (held)- "Very light, but surprisingly tough."
Moon Rock Wall- "Spacey and smooth!"
Scaled Furnace- "It's scalding!"
Wardrobe- "It holds dark, forbidden secrets..."
Wardrobe (burning)- "That's burning fast!"
Wardrobe (burnt)- "It's outta style now."
Wardrobe (unable to change, generic)- "I don't want to change right now."
Wardrobe (unable to change, on fire)- "It's too dangerous right now!"
Wardrobe (unable to change, in use)- "It can only handle one style change at a time."
Potted Succulent- "A succulent in a pot."
DIY Royalty Kit- "Looks fit for a swamp king!"
DIY Royalty Kit (burnt)- "There was something fishy about that throne anyway."
Royal Tapestry- "Just what is she planning?"
Royal Tapestry (burnt)- "I suppose we'll never know what it was for now."

Refine

Base Game

Rope- "Some short lengths of rope."
Boards- "Boards."
Cut Stone- "I've made them seductively smooth."
Papyrus- "Some sheets of paper."
Purple Gem- "It contains the mysteries of the universe."
Nightmare Fuel- "This stuff is crazy!"
Beeswax- "Beeswax is a scientifically proven preservative!"
Wax Paper- "Some sheets of wax paper."

Shipwrecked

Cloth- "Soft cloth made from hard root!"
Limestone- "Looks like a useful building material."
Empty Bottle- "Just an empty bottle."
Coral Nubbin- "I want nubbin to do with that."

Hamlet

Claw Palm Sapling- "Science at work."

Don't Starve Together

Cut Stone- "Seductively smooth."
Cratered Moonrock- "I should stick something shiny in it. For research."
Marble Bean- "I traded the old family cow for it."
Feathery Canvas- "I'm making a quillt!"

Magic

Base Game

Meat Effigy- "What a handsome devil!"
Prestihatitator- "Who would name something that?"
Shadow Manipulator- "What have I created?"
Pan Flute- "I can serenade the animals."
Night Light- "It gives off a spooky light."
Night Armor- "Wearing this makes me feel safe and insecure."
Dark Sword- "I dreamed it myself!"
One-man Band- "I should have added a beefalo bell."
Bat Bat- "I bet I could fly if I held two of these."
Belt of Hunger- "A soggy, sustaining, succulent suit."
Chilled Amulet- "Cool as ice!"
Nightmare Amulet- "It's whispering to me."
Life Giving Amulet- "I feel so safe when I'm wearing it."
Fire Staff- "I don't want to set the world on fire."
Ice Staff- "It's cold to the touch."
Telelocator Staff- "It can show me the world."
Telelocator Focus (full)- "It's ready to go."
Telelocator Focus (missing gem)- "It needs more purple gems."
Telolocator Socket (full)- "Looks ready."
Telelocator Socket (missing gem)- "It needs a gem."

Reign of Giants

Meat Effigy (burnt)- "Not much use anymore."
Prestihatitator (burnt)- "Fire doesn't really solve naming issues..."
Shadow Manipulator (burnt)- "Whatever it was, it's burnt now."
Old Bell- "Dingalingaling."

Shipwrecked

Piratihatitator- "It's twisting my tongue."
Piratihatitator (burnt)- "Fire doesn't really solve naming issues..."
Dripple Pipes- "Is it dripping...?"

Hamlet

Hogus Porkusator- "More science for my brain!"
Hogus Porkusator (burnt)- "More science for my brain!"
Pugalisk Wand- "Sends shivers down my spine."
Skyworthy (non-Hamlet world)- "Entrance-ing."
Skyworthy (Hamlet world)- "That's exit-ing!"
Living Artifact- "It's alive. ALIVE!"
Root Trunk- "It rooted out all my things!"
Vortex Cloak- "Ha ha! Take that nightmares!"

Don't Starve Together

Pan Flute- "To serenade the animals."
Night Armor- "Wearing that makes me feel safe and insecure."
Dark Sword- "Why would anyone make this? It's terrifying."
One-man Band- "We should add a beefalo bell."
Bat Bat- "I bet I could fly if I held two of them."
Life Giving Amulet- "I feel so safe when I get to wear it."
Telelocator Staff- "That could reveal the world."
Ocuvigil- "That's an entirely scientific mapping tool."
Moon Dial (generic)- "Water amplifies the science, allowing us to measure the moon."
Moon Dial (new moon)- "It's a new moon."
Moon Dial (waxing)- "The moon is waxing."
Moon Dial (full moon)- "It's a full moon."
Moon Dial (waning)- "The moon is waning."
Moon Dial (in Caves)- "There's no moon down here to measure."
The Lazy Deserter- "This pyramid controls the sands."
The Lazy Deserter (active)- "Ready for departiculation."
Kitschy Beaver Idol- "I guess science works differently up North."
Kitschy Goose Idol- "That thing's giving ME goosebumps!"
Kitschy Moose Idol- "A perfectly normal cursed moose thing."

Dress

Base Game

Sewing Kit- "Darn it! Darn it all to heck!"
Rabbit Earmuffs- "At least my ears won't get cold..."
Straw Hat- "Hats always ruin my hair."
Beefalo Hat- "That's a case of hat-hair waiting to happen."
Beekeeper Hat- "This should keep me protected."
Feather Hat- "I AM A BIRD!"
Winter Hat- "It'll be good for when winter comes."
Top Hat- "What a nice hat."
Dapper Vest- "This vest is dapper as all get-out."
Breezy Vest- "Wilderness casual."
Puffy Vest- "Winter survival gear."
Bush Hat- "It's kind of scratchy."
Garland- "It smells like prettiness."
Walking Cane- "It makes walking seem much easier!"

Reign of Giants

Cat Cap- "Ears hat!"
Fashion Melon- "Let the juice run down your face."
Ice Cube- "Stay cool, boy."
Rain Coat- "Keeps the rain where it ought to be. Outside my body."
Rain Hat- "It'll mess up my hair, but I'll stay nice and dry."
Summer Frest- "Keep off, evil sun!"
Floral Shirt- "It's not lab-safe!"
Eyebrella- "It will watch over me."
Hibearnation Vest- "Welcome to hibernation station!"

Shipwrecked

Brain of Thought- "Two brains means double the ideas!"
Snakeskin Hat- "Should repel the rain."
Snakeskin Jacket- "How fashionable!"
Blubber Suit- "Well, it's something."
Windbreaker- "The wind doesn't stand a chance!"
Tar Suit- "I'll pitch a fit if I have to wear that."
Particulate Purifier- "Sucks all the stink out."
Sleek Hat- "It really cuts through the air!"
Shark Tooth Crown- "What a dangerous looking hat."
Dumbrella- "The second umbrella keeps the first umbrella dry."

Hamlet

Gas Mask- "Now I can breath anywhere."
Pith Hat- "Pithy."
Thunderhat- "Does this hat make me look scientific?"

Don't Starve Together

Rabbit Earmuffs- "Makes you warm and fuzzy inside. Outside, too."
Beekeeper Hat- "Protects your skin, but squashes your meticulous coiffure."
Feather Hat- "BECOME THE BIRD!"
Walking Cane- "Technically walking is just controlled falling."
Rain Coat- "Keeps the rain where it ought to be. Outside your body."
Rain Hat- "Messy hair... the terrible price of dryness."
Eyebrella- "It watches over the wearer."
Fashion Goggles- "What a stylish pair of goggles."
Desert Goggles- "Quality eye protection."
Funcap- "Makes the wearer look like a fun guy."
Seawreath- "Sometimes you have to feel worse to feel better."
Clever Disguise- "Finally, I can show my face in public."

Ancient

Base Game

Thulecite- "I wonder where this is from?"
Thulecite Wall (held)- "A solid piece of history."
Thulecite Wall- "An ancient piece of wall."
Thulecite Medallion (min)- "All is well."
Thulecite Medallion (rising low)- "Getting pretty magical around here."
Thulecite Medallion (rising high)- "I think it's becoming more concentrated!"
Thulecite Medallion (max)- "It seems to be staying steady."
Thulecite Medallion (receding high)- "Feels like it's receding."
Thulecite Medallion (receding low)- "The nightmare is almost gone!"
Thulecite Medallion (outside ruins)- "There's no magic around here."
The Lazy Forager- "Teleportation can be so useful."
Magiluminescence- "Warm to the touch."
Construction Amulet- "Just when I thought I couldn't get any better."
The Lazy Explorer- "This beats walking."
Star Caller's Staff- "I put a gem on a stick."
Deconstruction Staff- "This will come in handy."
Pick/Axe- "It's brilliant!"
Thulecite Crown- "Fit for a king. Or me."
Thulecite Suit- "It's oddly light."
Thulecite Club- "It has quite a heft to it."
Houndius Shootius (held)- "I think it's sleeping."
Houndius Shootius- "I hope it doesn't turn on me."

Don't Starve Together

Thulecite Medallion (rising high)- "It's becoming more concentrated!"
Construction Amulet- "No base should be without one!"
Star Caller's Staff- "A genius invention... a gem on a stick."
Thulecite Crown- "How's my hair?"

Nautical

Shipwrecked

Log Raft- "This looks... boat-like..."
Raft- "This looks... adequate..."
Row Boat- "It runs on elbow grease."
Cargo Boat- "It has room for all my stuff!"
Armored Boat- "That is one durable boat."
Encrusted Boat- "A mere shell of a ship."
The "Sea Legs"- "A vessel fit for a scallywag."
Boat Repair Kit- "This will add some float to my boat."
Thatch Sail- "This should really transform my boating experience."
Cloth Sail- "That wind isn't getting away now!"
Snakeskin Sail- "Scale it and sail it!"
Feather Lite Sail- "It's feather-light!"
Iron Wind- "This is how a scientist should travel."
Boat Cannon- "The only thing better than a boat is a boat with a cannon."
Quackering Ram- "Does my ingenuity know no bounds?!"
Sea Trap (held and placed)- "For the deadliest catch."
Sea Yard (off)- "It's not in shipshape right now."
Sea Yard (on)- "For keeping my ships in tiptop shape!"
Sea Yard (out of fuel)- "I'll need to refill that soon."
Tar Extractor (off)- "I have to turn it on."
Tar Extractor (on)- "It's running smoothly."
Tar Extractor (out of fuel)- "I need to refuel that."
Trawl Net- "Nothing but net."
Trawl Net (detached)- "It's bulging with potential!"
Trawl Net (sinking)- "I think it's sinking."
Trawl Net (sinking soon)- "It is definitely sinking."
Spyglass- "I spy with my little eye..."
Super Spyglass- "I can see forever!"
Captain Hat- "The proper boating attire!"
Pirate Hat- "Fit for a cutthroat scallywag. Or me."
Lucky Hat- "Does it make me look scurvy... I mean scary!?"
Life Jacket- "Keeps me afloat without my boat!"

Hamlet

Cork Bowl Canoe- "An accident waiting to happen."

Volcanic

Shipwrecked

Obsidian Machete- "It's hot to the touch."
Obsidian Axe- "A winning combination!"
Obsidian Spear- "This will leave a mark."
Obsidian Armor- "I'm a genius."
Obsidian Coconade- "It's even bombier!"
Howling Conch- "I can hear the wind trapped within."
Sail Stick- "There must be a scientific explanation for this."
Volcano Staff- "The label says 'Keep out of reach of children'."

Treasure Hunting

Hamlet

Disarming Tools- "A trap for traps!"
Ball Pein Hammer- "It's a tiny little hammer."
Gold Pan- "Critics panned it."
Magnifying Glass- "Science awaits!"

City Planning

Hamlet

Lamp Post (off)- "Lusterless."
Lamp Post (on)- "Plain fire. No science involved."
Town House- "Both a house, and a home."
Town House (burning)- "That house is on fire!"
The Sterling Trough Deli- "A place to eat."
Pigg and Pigglet's General Store- "A common store full of common goods."
Curly Tails Mud Spa- "I could use a fix-me-up."
Swinesbury Fine Grocer's- "There's fresh produce in there."
Miss Sow's Floral Arrangements- "A garden variety shop."
'The Sty' Oddities Emporium- "A lot of strange things in there."
The Flying Pig Arcane Shop- "This could put a twinkle in my eye."
The Boar's Tusk Weapon Shop- "Instruments of destruction."
The Sow's Ear Hat Shop- "A place to hang your hat."
Swinesbury Academy- "I can smell the history."
Swinesbury Mineral Exchange- "Ah. A useful place for a change."
The Tinkerer's Tower- "For science-ing!"
Swinesbury City Hall- "The local lawmaker."
My City Hall- "I'm a Gentleman Politician now."
Security Contract- "It says I can hire my own town guard."
Slanty Shanty- "Who would want to live there?"
Slanty Shanty (owned)- "Home sweet home."
Slanty Shanty (burnt)- "I hope the insurance will cover that."
Watch Tower- "It's surprisingly sturdy."

Renovate

Hamlet

House Expansion Permit- "My new lab awaits!"
Demolition Permit- "Time to demonstrate some demolition."

Flooring

Wood, Checkered, and Slate Flooring- "Totally floored."
Marble Flooring- "It's the floor."
Sheet Metal Flooring- "A-floor-dable."
Garden Stone Flooring- "A stone cold floor."
Geometric Tiles Flooring- "A geometric ton of flooring."
Shag Carpet- "Wipes the floor with the other flooring."
Transitional Flooring- "I 'wood' not say no to someone finishing this."
Wood Panel Flooring- "Totally floored."
Herringbone Flooring- "Stone cold floor."
Hexagon Flooring- "Totally floored."
Curvy Hoof Flooring- "Totally floored."
Octagon Flooring- "Geometric ton of flooring."

Shelves

Carved Bookshelf, Windowed Cabinet, and Marble, Glass, Hutch, Adjustable, Wall Mounted, and A-Frame Shelf- "A place to put stuff."
Basic Bookshelf- "Basic."
Cinderblock Bookshelf and Crates and Pallet Shelf- "It could use some work."
Ladder Shelf- "Nice use for a ladder."
Industrial Shelf- "Functional."
Fridge- "This doesn't make sense."
Floating and Pipe Shelf- "A place to hang stuff."
Hat Tree- "A place to hang your hat."

Plantholders

Basic Plantholder- "It's a potted plant."
WIP Plantholder- "It's still a work in progress."
Fancy Plantholder- "That's fancy."
Bonsai, Dishgarden, Philodendron, Birdcage, and Palm Plantholder- "A fancy way to hold a plant."
Orchid, Draceana, Xerographica, and Marble Plantholder- "A fancy way to hold a fancy plant."
ZZ Plantholder- "A holder for a fancy plant."
Fernstand Plantholder- "A fancy way to hold a boring plant."
Fern Plantholder- "A hanging plant."
Terrarium Plantholder- "A plant cage."
Plantpet Plantholder- "It's like a pet that grows!"
Traps Plantholder- "Those look hungry."
Pitcher Plantholder- "It's a growing chandelier!"
"Character" Tree- "It's bent out of shape over something."
Festive Tree- "Is it that time of year already?"

Columns

Planed Wood and Round Column- "Stable enough."
Millinery Column- "Adds some stability."
Lit Marble Column- "Adds some fancy stability."

Wall Papers

Wood Panelling- "A bunch of wood."
Checkered Wall Paper- "A chunk of checkered stuff put on a wall."
Floral Wall Paper- "Some fancy stuff put on a wall."
Sunflower and Harlequin Wall Paper- "Pretty paper on a wall."
Peagawk Wall Paper- "Pretty paper on a wall."
Orange Wall Paper- "It's a wall."
Purple Wall Paper- "It's a wall."
Rope Wall Panneling- "I'm 'knot' going to say anything bad about it."
Circle Wall Tiling- "Pretty paper on a wall."
Marble Wall Tiling- "'Marble'ous piece of wall."
Fine Wall Tiling- "It's a wall."
Full Wall Moulding- "Kind of square."
Upholstered Wall- "Im-'plush'-onable."

Ceiling Lights

Wired Bulb- "Looks pretty sad."
Metal Shade Lamp- "Very functional."
Chandalier and Hanging Blooming and Floral Lamp- "A fancy hanging light."
Rope Light- "It could use some decoration."
Dual Rope Light- "Two boring lights."
Blown Glass Bulb- "Fancy hanging light."
Cherry Lamp Shade- "A fancy light."
Tophat and Derby Light- "Someone left their hat up there."

Wall Decorations

Photo- "Who's that kid?"
Full Length Mirror- "Now I can look at my gentlemanly figure."
Embroidery Hoop- "How cozy."
Mosaic and Wreath- "Well that's nice."
Axe- "I have an axe to grind with this."
Hunt- "In-spear-ed."
Periodic Table and Gears Art- "Science-y."
Cape- "A little dramatic."
No Smoking- "Science says it's bad for your health."
Black Cat- "Is this bad luck, or good?"
Tasteful Fish Mounting- "So that's where the smell is coming from."
Beefalo Mounting- "He looks unhappy."

Chairs

Classic and Lounge Chair- "I could sit on that."
Corner Chair- "Someone could sit on that."
Bench- "A couple people could sit on that."
Horned Chair- "A spiky seat."
Footrest- "Somewhere to rest my feet."
Massager Chair- "I don't trust it."
Stuffed Chair- "A comfy chair to sit on."
Rocking Chair- "That chair is rocking!"
Ottoman Chair- "Seat. Foot rest. The ottoman has many uses."
Fancy Chaise- "A chair to chaise after."

House Upgrades

Cottage Kit- "Builds a small domicile."
Tudor Home Kit- "Builds a simple residence."
Gothic Home Kit- "Builds a dwelling with some character."
Brick Home Kit- "Builds a brickwork residence."
Turreted Home Kit- "Builds a reasonable shelter."
Villa Kit- "Builds a considerable home."
Manor Kit- "Builds a sizable habitation."

Doors

Hardwood Door- "I wood like to see whats through there."
Stone Archway- "That door rocks."
Forest Door- "I feel like it's watching me."
Wrought Iron Door- "A door I can go through."
Curtained Door- "A door I can go through."
Industrial Door- "A door I can go through."
Round Doorway- "A little like being eaten."
Gothic Door- "I hope that bat is dead."

Windows

Peaked Curtain Window- "Lets in some sunlight."
Round Burlap Window- "Not exactly high class."
Peaked and Square Window- "It's a window."
Tall Window- "It's a window. A tall window."
Large Square Curtain Window- "Lets in some sunlight."
Tall Curtain Window- "It's a window. That's tall."
Greenhouse Wall- "A big window."

Rugs

Eye Rug- "I feel like someone's watching me."
Square Throw Rug- "Kind of square."
Oval, Octagon, and Braid Rug- "It's a rug."
Large Rug- "It covers a lot of ground."
Fur Throw and Porcupus Rug- "A dead animal someone left on the floor."
Hedgehog Rug- "I can step on you!"
Hoofprint Rug- "Did an animal step on this or is it just decoration?"
Swirl Rug- "Swirlish."
Catcoon Rug- "There's a dead animal on the floor."
Rubbermat Rug- "Good for the lab."
Web Rug- "Oh what a tangled web we weave..."
Metal Rug- "I better test its metal."
Wormhole Rug- "Just a reproduction."
Beard Rug- "Is that my beard?"
Nailbed Rug- "I think they nailed it."
Crime Rug- "Murderous."
Soccer Rug- "Geometrical."

Lamps

Fringe, Stainglass, Downbridge, Dual Embroidered, Ceramic, Glass, Candelabra, Gothic, Orb, Bellshade, Crystals, Upturn, Right Angle, and Fancy Lamp- "A fancy lamp."
Stainglass Lamp- "A pretty lamp."
Dual Fringes Lamp- "Two for the price of one."
Elizabethan Lamp- "An old fancy lamp."
Dual Upturn Lamp- "Two for the price of one!"
Spool Lamp- "A little plain."
Edison Lamp- "This one could use a lampshade."
Adjustable Lamp- "A practical lamp."

Tables

Round Table- "It's a round table."
Hard Wood Desk- "I could get some work done there."
DIY Table- "Pretty basic."
College Table- "Interesting decor..."
Crate Table- "I could put things on that."
Chess Table- "Check and mate."

Cartography

Don't Starve Together

Map Scroll (empty)- "A blank map. Doesn't seem very useful."

Critters

Don't Starve Together

Kittykit- "You'd make a good lab assistant."
Vargling- "Pretty cute for a lil monster!"
Ewelet- "Much less mucusy than its momma."
Broodling- "It's wyrmed its way into my heart."
Glomglom- "What an aerodynamical creature!"
Giblet- "My feathered friend."
Mothling- "I keep her around because she's good at mothematics."

Sculpt

Don't Starve Together

Carved Hornucopia- "It makes me hungry just looking at it."
Bubble Pipe Carving- "That was never really my thing."
Pawn Figure- "I can relate."
Rook Figure- "It's even heavier than it looks."
Knight Figure- "It's a horse, of course."
Bishop Figure- "It's a stone bishop."
Rook, Knight, and Bishop Figures (shaking on new moon)- "The chess pieces are moving themselves!"
Queenly Figure- "Hmm...looks familiar."
Kingly Figure- "That doesn't look so kingly to me."
Deerclops Figure- "I feel like its eye follows you."
Bearger Figure- "It was a lot bigger up close."
Moose/Goose Figure- "Eurgh. It's so lifelike."
Dragonfly Figure- "Ah, that brings back memories. Bad ones."
Moon Moth Figure- "It looks nice, doesn't it?"
Anchor Figure- "It's as heavy as it looks."
"Moon" Figure- "I've been feeling pretty inspired lately."

Celestial

Don't Starve Together

Moon Rock Idol- "I only worship science."
Portal Paraphernalia- "Stuff for science!"
Moon Glass Axe- "I've made it extra effective."
Glass Cutter- "I'm not really cut out for fighting."
Bath Bomb- "It's just textbook chemistry."

Seafaring

Don't Starve Together

Boat Kit- "It would be nice to do some experiments on the water."
Oar and Driftwood Oar- "Manual ship acceleration."
Boat Patch- "Just in case of disaster."
Anchor Kit- "Now I can build an anchor."
Mast- "Now I can build a mast."
Winged Sail- "Spread my wings and sail away!"
Steering Wheel Kit- "That's going to be the steering wheel."

Books

Shipwrecked

Joy of Volcanology- "The foreword just says 'Hope you like dragoons.'"

Don't Starve Together

Birds of the World- "No point studying when I can just wing it."
Applied Horticulture- "I see no farm in reading that."
Sleepytime Stories- "Strange, it's just 500 pages of telegraph codes."
The End is Nigh!- "The beginning was dull, but got better near the end."
On Tentacles- "Someone'll get suckered into reading this."

Engineering

Don't Starve Together

Trusty Tape- "Good for mending."
Winona's Catapult- "She's made a sort of automatic defense system."
Winona's Catapult and Spotlight (not connected to generator)- "It needs some electricity."
Winona's Inventions (burning)- "It's on fire!"
Winona's Inventions (burnt)- "Science couldn't save it."
Winona's Spotlight- "What an ingenious idea!"
Winona's Generator- "Looks science-y. How does it work?"
Winona's Generator (low fuel)- "It's getting low on power."
Winona's Generator (out of fuel)- "I could get it working, if Winona's busy."
Winona's G.E.M.erator- "Hey! That's not science!"
Winona's G.E.M.erator (low fuel)- "It'll turn off soon."
Winona's G.E.M.erator (out of fuel)- "Science beats magic, every time."

Green Thumb

Don't Starve Together

Bramble Husk- "The best offense is a good defense."
Bramble Trap- "It'd really poke whoever stepped on it."
Compost Wrap- "Wormwood offered me a bite, but I respectfully declined."

Seasonings

Don't Starve Together

Garlic Powder- "A powerfully potent powder."
Honey Crystals- "Sweet! It's sweet!"
Chili Flakes- "A flagon of fiery fluid."
Seasoning Salt- "A little sodium's good for the heart."

Events (only)

Hallowed Nights

Candy Bag- "It's some sort of delicious pocket dimension for sugary treats."
Candy Apple- "The cavities are probably worth it, right?"
Candy Corn- "What corruption of science grew these?"
Catcoon Candy- "My teeth are going to have something to say about this tomorrow."
Choco Pigs- "Much better tasting than the real thing."
Ghost Pop and Tentacle Lolli- "Only a sucker wouldn't love this."
Gummy Spider- "They wriggle on the way down."
Jelly Worm- "Sticks to your teeth."
Not-So-Candy Corn- "It's... corn."
Raisins- "Everyone'll be raisin' a fuss over these."
"Raisins"- "I... don't think I'll be eating those."
Candy Lice- "Did that candy just move?"
Otherworldly Jawbreaker- "Oh, my poor jaw."
Lava Pepper- "I don't do well with spice."
Broken Stake- "I don't believe in the supernatural."
Cubic Zirkonia Ball- "I know someone who'd have a ball with this!"
Empty Elixir- "Hard to find a good flask around here."
Faux Fangs- "I might need these after all that candy."
Monkey Paw- "Let's make a wish. For science."
Spider Ring- "I hope this doesn't attract spiders."
Binoculars- "I think it came from another world. One with grifts."
Lone Glove- "I wonder where the other one is?"
Snail Scale- "Holding it makes me feel like bartering."
Goop Canister- "It's a little warm to the touch."
Toy Cobra- "It's full of someone's childhood memories."
Crocodile Toy- "It's not very good at jumping."
Broken Terrarium- "It's some sort of plant specimen."
Odd Radio- "It's picking up frequencies from another world."
Broken Hairdryer- "Maybe a tool for testing aerodynamics?"
Mad Scientist Lab- "Sanity is a small price to pay for science!"
Brew of Phobic Abrogation and Brew of Phobic Abatement- "Full of grit."
Canteen of Sanguine Mixture and Tumblerful of Psychic Fortitude- "A potent potion."
Flask of Sanguine Mixture and Dram of Psychic Fortitude- "I was hoping for something bigger."
Sulfuric Crystals of Saltpeter and Sulfuric Crystals of Lime- "Crystalized inferno."
Steeped Lunar Essence- "Infused with transforming such-and-such."
Totally Normal Root- "Something's in there! I'll have to root it out."
Totally Normal Sapling- "It'll grow up big and horrifying."
Bat Decoration- "Completely batty decoration."
Crow Decoration- "Everyone's raven about tree decorations these days."
Dangling Depth Dweller Decoration- "This wood look good hanging somewhere."
Ghost Decoration- "A spectornament I could hang in a tree."
Spider Decoration- "Eight-armed adornment."
Tentacle Decoration- "Almost i-tentacle to the real ones."
Bats coming out of tree- "Did you see that?!"
Drinking bravery potion- "Those trees don't seem so spooky anymore."

Winter's Feast

Gift Wrap- "That's a wrap!"
Gift- "Is that for me?"
Festive Tree Planter- "I need a pine cone for that."
Festive Tree Planter and Winter's Feast Tree (burnt)- "That puts a damper on the festivities."
Winter's Feast Tree (sapling)- "It's almost Winter's Feast!"
Winter's Feast Tree- "Happy Winter's Feast!"
Winter's Feast Tree (burning)- "That was a mistake, I think."
Gingerbread Cookie- "The anatomy's not right, but I'll overlook it."
Eternal Fruitcake- "That experiment may have been a tiny bit unethical."
Sugar Cookie- "I'm going to eat forty. For science."
Candy Cane- "A Yuletide toothache waiting to happen."
Chocolate Log Cake- "It's nice to eat something other than berries for once."
Plum Pudding- "I'm puddin' that straight in my mouth!"
Apple Cider- "It's a hollowed apple filled with yummy juice."
Hot Cocoa- "How does it stay warm? A thermodynamical mug?"
Heavenly Eggnog- "Can science explain why it tastes so good?"