Maxwell quotes

This page lists Maxwell's Quotes which are spoken when the player examines an in-game item or object. The player can shift-click items and objects to examine them.

Tools

 * Axe- "Sometimes the direct approach is best."


 * Luxury Axe- "It gets sharper with every cut."


 * Shovel- "This is some real advanced techology."


 * Regal Shovel- "This shovel is worth a princely sum."


 * Pickaxe- "Everybody loves a little mining."


 * Opulent Pickaxe- "This must be game logic."


 * Razor- "If only the world had a single neck."


 * Razor (can't shave)- "If only the world had a single neck."


 * Razor (nothing left)- "If only the world had a single neck."


 * Razor (Shaving a waken beefalo)- "I'm not going to try that while he's awake."


 * Hammer- "It feels good to undo the work of others."


 * Pitchfork- "The tool of choice for perfectionists."

Lights

 * Campfire (upon being built)- "Sure beats darkness."


 * Campfire (high)- "That will keep Charlie away for now."


 * Campfire (normal)- "Firey."


 * Campfire (low)- "It needs fuel."


 * Campfire (embers)- "I'm going to lose it."


 * Campfire (burned out)- "That's not coming back."


 * Fire Pit (upon being built)- "Sure beats darkness."


 * Fire Pit (high)- "A roaring fire."


 * Fire Pit (normal)- "It's hot."


 * Fire Pit (low)- "It's getting low."


 * Fire Pit (embers)- "I should attend to that."


 * Fire Pit (burned out)- "It's gone cold."
 * Torch- "It keeps Charlie at bay."
 * Torch (run out)- "Dang it. Another torch down."


 * Miner Hat- "Eventually the firefly will starve."


 * Pumpkin Lantern- "Why hello, Mr. Crane."


 * Lantern- "I hope this keeps Them away."

Survival

 * Backpack- "I wish there were porters around here."


 * Piggyback- "Oh that's just demeaning."


 * Bird Trap- "They keep falling for it!"


 * Bug Net- "Good for capturing defenseless insects."


 * Fishing Rod- "I will eat for a lifetime."
 * Straw Roll- "I don't like sleeping rough."
 * Fur Roll- "At least they're good for something."


 * Tent- "That's a bit rustic for my taste."


 * Trap- "Only the dumbest animals will fall for this."


 * Healing Salve- "Just a bit of venom and some dirty old ash."


 * Honey Poultice- "Sticky and gooey and good for putting on booboos."


 * Heat Stone- "A pocketful of heat."


 * Heat Stone (cold)- "A pocketful of heat."


 * Heat Stone (warm)- "Comfortably warm."


 * Heat Stone (hot)- " It's almost too hot to hold."


 * Umbrella- "It's crooked!"
 * Compass- This quote is dependant on the orientation of the map. Potential lines include: North, Northeast, East, Southeast, South, Southwest, West, Northwest.

Food

 * Crock Pot- "Just the thought makes my mouth water."


 * Crock Pot (cooking, long time left)- "Wait for it..."


 * Crock Pot (cooking, short time left)- "Here it comes!"


 * Crock Pot (finished)- "Finally, some quality grub."


 * Crock Pot (failed to add item)- "That can't go in there."


 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm- "Do I look like a farmer?"


 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm (growing)- "It's growing."


 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm (needs fertilizer)- "Needs manure."


 * Ice Box- "A little piece of winter in a box."


 * Drying Rack- "I can dry meats so that they last longer."


 * Drying Rack (drying)-  "Still moist."


 * Drying Rack (finished)- "Like the desert."

Science

 * Science Machine- "I can't believe I forgot how to build these things."


 * Alchemy Engine- "It unlocks recipies of middling utility."
 * Prestihatitator- "Quite a dapper machine."


 * Shadow Manipulator- "This is where I do my own personal research."


 * Winterometer- "Not the most useful invention isn't it?"


 * Rainometer- "I could also just look up to learn the same thing."


 * Lightning Rod- "A little bit of protection!"


 * Lightning Rod (charged)- "Energy flows through it."


 * Gunpowder- "Now this, I like."

Fight

 * Spear- "It's a spear. Yup."


 * Ham Bat- "An undignified weapon for a less refined time."


 * Boomerang- "Beats getting your hands messy."


 * Boomerang (hit self)- "OW! Clumsy!"


 * Blow Dart- "It's a... thing."


 * Sleep Dart- "Call me Mr. Sandman."


 * Fire Dart- "Just make sure to breathe out."


 * Football Helmet- "Now I am ready for the scrimmage."


 * Grass Suit- "Direct confrontation is quite gauche."


 * Log Suit- "Ugh, I'm not one for such vulgar fisticuffs."


 * Marble Suit- "That really isn't my style."


 * Bee Mine- "They wait so patiently."


 * Tooth Trap- "This one packs a punch."


 * Shelmet- "This will keep me standing. If I need to fight.


 * Snurtle Shell Armor- "That is not dapper at all."

Structures

 * Bee Box- "It holds my bees."
 * Bee Box (no honey)- "My bees are not working hard enough."
 * Bee Box (some honey)- "I should wait a bit longer."
 * Bee Box (full with honey)- "So tempting, but so full of bees."


 * Birdcage- "You'll never get me behind bars again."


 * Birdcage (occupied)- "I feel for ya, feathers."


 * Birdcage (occupied, sleeping)- "You'll still be in there when you wake up."


 * Pig House- "That's like their only trick."


 * Pig House (occupied and lights are off)- "I'll huff and I'll puff!"


 * Pig House (occupied and lights are on)- "I'd go inside too, if I was him."
 * Hay Wall (inventory)- "Pocket-sized wall pieces. Yup."


 * Hay Wall (placed)- "It's a tinderbox."
 * Wood Wall (inventory)- "Pocket-sized wall pieces. Yup."


 * Wood Wall (placed)- "Moderately tough, but flammable!"
 * Stone Wall (inventory)- "Pocket-sized wall pieces. Yup."


 * Stone Wall (placed)- "This will keep the riff-raff out."


 * Chest- "A place to store loot."
 * Chest (full)- "It's full"
 * Chest (not allowed to store, like backpack)-


 * Sign- "It says... nothing."
 * Potted Fern- "How quanit."sic

Turfs

 * Cobblestones- "At least this one is useful."


 * Wooden Flooring- "I prefer hardwoods."


 * Checkerboard Flooring- "That's my natural habitat."


 * Carpet Flooring- "That's a quality, high-pile carpet sample!"


 * Grass Turf- "Scratchy."


 * Marsh Turf- "It's dripping all over."


 * Savannah Turf- "Dirty."


 * Forest Turf- "Smells like mud."


 * Rocky Turf- "Kinda rough."


 * Fungal Turf- "Turf."


 * Slimy Turf- "Turf."
 * Mud Turf- "Turf"
 * Cave Rock Turf- "Turf"


 * Guano Turf- "It's a... thing."

Refine

 * Rope- "You'd think this would have more uses."


 * Boards- "Roughly hewn."


 * Cut Stone- "The building blocks of civilization."


 * Papyrus- "A blank canvas."


 * Purple Gem- "Purple brings great power."


 * Nightmare Fuel- "Ahhh. Refreshing."

Magic

 * Meat Effigy- "I'm not above using this."


 * Pan Flute- "I'm going to sing a song of madness."


 * Night Light- "It burns with a beautiful glow."


 * Night Armour- "Time to wrap myself in nightmares."


 * Dark Sword- "Snicker-snack!"


 * One-man Band- "It has a good beat, and you can dance to it."


 * Bat Bat- "Violence has never felt better."
 * Chilled Amulet- "It's frosted over."
 * Nightmare Amulet- "It speaks with the shadow."
 * Life Giving Amulet- "It channels the darkest energies of the universe."
 * Fire Staff- "A basic enchantment, but effective."
 * Ice Staff- "It's a... thing."
 * Telelocator Staff- "Power can do amazing things when funneled through the right channels."
 * Complete Telelocator Base-  "That should do the trick."
 * Incomplete Telelocator Base-  "The fuel needs more focus points."
 * Empty Telolocator Socket "This one's ready."
 * Full Telelocator Socket- "The fuel needs a focus."

Dress

 * Sewing Kit- "A fine and noble endeavour."
 * Rabbit Earmuffs- "They are at least warm."


 * Strawhat- "A hat fit for a peasant."


 * Beefalo Hat- "How unfashionable."


 * Beekeeper Hat- "I'll wear it if I have to."


 * Feather Hat- "I will lure them in with my plumage."


 * Winter Hat- "How disappointingly rustic."


 * Top Hat- "Some fine haberdashery."


 * Dapper Vest- "It's a... thing."


 * Breezy Vest- "It's more of a fall vest."


 * Puffy Vest- "It's so hard to look fashionable in the winter."


 * Bush Hat- "There's room in there for me."


 * Garland- "Definitely not my style."
 * Walking Cane- "It has pictures of fast things carved into it."

Ancient

 * Thulecite Medallion(min)- "The heart of the city is still."
 * Thulecite Medallion(rising low)- "It beats once again."
 * Thulecite Medallion(rising high)- "The pulse is quickening."
 * Thulecite Medallion(max)- "The pulse is holding steady."
 * Thulecite Medallion(receding high)- "The pulse is waning."
 * Thulecite Medallion(receding low)- "It calms once more."
 * Lazy Forager's Amulet- "Simple magic is often the best."
 * Magiluminescence- "This will make me stand out."
 * Construction Amulet- "I swear I don't normally need this."
 * The Lazy Explorer- "I must rely on focusing tools in this form."
 * Star Caller's Staff- "With a bigger gem it would be so much more powerful."
 * Deconstruction Staff- "I must rely on focusing tools in this form."
 * Pick/Axe- "I don't know why I didn't think of this."
 * Thulecite Crown- "It's a... thing."
 * Thulecite Suit- "Thulecite meshes so well with nightmare fuel."
 * Thulecite Club- "The fuel runs deep in this."
 * Houndious Shootius- "Now I just have to set it up."
 * Houndious Shootius(placed)- "Some of my better work."

Nature - Plants

 * Evergreen- "I've heard them described as 'piney'."


 * Evergreen (chopped)- "That's not about to grow back."


 * Evergreen (burning)- "Oops."


 * Evergreen (burnt)- "Ashes to ashes."
 * Lumpy Evergreen- "It looks sickly."


 * Log- "It's a piece of wood, what more is there to say?"


 * Log (burning)- "Well, that was fun while it lasted."


 * Charcoal- "Nothing will steal my carbon!"


 * Pinecone- "A more outdoorsy type might be able to make something of this."


 * Baby Evergreen "A more outdoorsy type might be able to make something of this."


 * Spiky Tree- "A tree with a foul demeanor."


 * Spiky Tree (chopped)- "Tree 0, Maxwell 1."


 * Spiky Tree (burning)- "There it goes."


 * Spiky Tree (burnt)- "It's no use to anyone now."


 * Marble Tree- "How whimsical."


 * Sapling- "A supple, woody stem."


 * Sapling (picked)- "It'll grow back."


 * Sapling (burning)- "Oops."


 * Sapling (picked up)- "Do I look like a gardener?"


 * Twigs- "Common, but useful."


 * Grass- "Tufty."


 * Grass (picked)- "Already harvested."


 * Grass (barren)- "Needs manure."


 * Grass (burning)- "Oops."


 * Grass Tuft- "Do I look like a gardener?"


 * Cut Grass- "The mundane stuff of the earth."


 * Berry Bush- "Reduced to eating berries. Sigh."


 * Berry Bush (picked)- "And now we wait."


 * Berry Bush (barren)- "It needs manure."
 * Berry Bush (burning)- "Reduced to eating berries. Sigh."


 * Berry Bush (picked up)- "Do I look like a gardener?"


 * Reeds- "There's wind in them there willows."


 * Reeds (picked)- "No more tubes."


 * Reeds (burning)-."Oops."


 * Cut Reeds- "I think I could build something useful from this."


 * Plant- "Leafy!"


 * Plant (growing)- "It's growing."


 * Plant (ready to be picked)- "It's ready."


 * Marsh Plant- "What a generic little plant."


 * Spiky Bush- "It's twisted and thorny, just like me!"


 * Spiky Bush (after picking)- "I scratched my arms up doing this."


 * Flower- "I am filled with the irrational urge to stomp upon it."


 * Petals- "Like so much confetti."


 * Evil Flower- "I like that flower."


 * Dark Petals- "It's dripping with nightmare essence."


 * Red Mushroom (unpicked)- "It's a red mushroom."


 * Red Mushroom (unpicked, sleeping)- "I'll have to come back for it."


 * Red Mushroom (picked)- "It's all used up."


 * Green Mushroom (unpicked)- "Green Fungus."


 * Green Mushroom (unpicked, sleeping)- "When do those ones come up?"


 * Green Mushroom (picked)- "Been there, done that."


 * Blue Mushroom (unpicked)- "The blue ones are good for something."


 * Blue Mushroom (unpicked, sleeping)- "It's not ready."


 * Blue Mushroom (picked)- "Another time, maybe?"

Nature - Objects

 * Bee Hive- "Not the bees!"
 * Killer Bee Hive- "That looks dangerous."


 * Honeycomb- "It's full of bee seeds"
 * Hound Mound- "It's a tunnel down to the hound nests."
 * Bone- "Hungry devils, aren't they?"
 * Touch Stone- "There's a story behind that..."
 * Harp Statue- "Not my best work."
 * Marble Pillar- "I've always wondered who built those."
 * Marble- "It's strong stuff."
 * Merm House- "They copied the pigs, but they're even less intelligent."
 * Merm Head- "The eyes follow you around."
 * Pig Head- "Erm...charming."
 * Pig Torch- "Great. Now they have fire."
 * Basalt Boulder- "I made a rock so heavy that I can't lift it."


 * Boulder- "It's a rock."


 * Rocks- "Hmmm. Now what do I do with them?"


 * Flint- "Ow! I cut my finger!."


 * Nitre- "One third of the way there..."
 * Gold Nugget- "This was important to me once."
 * Headstone (1)- "It says milk. Eggs. Bacon."


 * Headstone (2)- "Here lies some guy. Blah blah blah."


 * Headstone (3)- "Hey, that's my name!"


 * Headstone (4)- "This headstone is blank."


 * Grave- "What lies beneath?"


 * Grave (dug)- "Already got that one."


 * Suspicious Dirt Pile- "That looks out-of-place."


 * Animal Tracks- "Some dumb beast passed through here."


 * Animal Tracks (lost its trail)-  "Drat! It got away."


 * Animal Tracks (found)- "I smell dung and beast-sweat."


 * Wooden Thing- "My beautiful machine is in pieces!"


 * Wooden Thing (partially assembled)- "It is still incomplete."


 * Wooden Thing (fully assembled)- "It's alive!"


 * Ring Thing- "This is the quantum field guard band."


 * Crank Thing- "This is used to agitate the humours."


 * Box Thing- "This is a box full of sadness and woe."


 * Metal Potato Thing- "The gears in here are so small they turn the fabric of reality."


 * Wormhole (closed)- "It's worse knowing what the other part looks like."


 * Wormhole (open)- "I can assure you that it smells worse than it looks."


 * Wormhole (exited)- "Yech. It's horrible in there."
 * Pond- "I can see my face reflected off the top."
 * Skeleton- "Ha! I remember that one."


 * Spider Den- "They grow big here."


 * Spider Egg- "Squishy."


 * Rabbit Hole- "There's a world going on under there."
 * Walrus Camp- "The Walrusser can't be far."
 * Walrus Camp (Summer)- "I best not linger when winter comes."

Nature - Caves

 * Plugged Sinkhole- <"I plugged it a long time ago."
 * Sinkhole- "That was not a good idea!"
 * Rope to Surface- "Get me out of here!"
 * Mushtree- "It smells of rot and failure."
 * Red Mushtree- "Where's Waldo?"
 * Green Mushtree- "Ugh, it smells bad."
 * Light Flower- "It's so dark down here."
 * Light Bulb- "It will run out eventually."
 * Stalagmite- "Rocks. How dull."
 * Stalagmite (pointy)- "Stalagmite. How dull."
 * Spilagmite- "How did that get down here?"
 * Slurtle Mound- "That's revolting."
 * Rabbit Hutch- "Oh, isn't that clever."
 * Barrel- "What a disgusting home."
 * Fern- "I'd like to step on it."
 * Foilage- "A meal fit for a pesant [sic]"
 * Cave Banana Tree- "It looks like a banana, but I'm not buying it."

Nature - Ruins

 * Ancient Statue- "A once proud race."
 * Broken Ancient Pseudoscience Station- "This can be partially restored."
 * Ancient Pseudoscience Station- "Where are their gods now?"
 * Broken Clockworks- "Mechanical refuse."
 * Relic- "Remnants of an extinct civilization."
 * Cave Lichen- "Only a cyanobacteria could grow in this light"
 * Ornate Chest- "It's a trap."
 * Nightmare Light- "The over-use of fuel was their downfall."
 * Thulecite- "An exceedingly rare but useful material."
 * Thulecite Wall- "An ancient wall."
 * Thulecite Wall(item)- "Pocket sized wall pieces.  Yup."

Mobs - Monsters

 * Clockwork Knight- "Such quality worksmanship!"
 * Clockwork Bishop- "I'm especially proud of that piece."
 * Clockwork Castle- "A castle for my home."
 * Damaged Bishop- "They degrade without proper upkeep."
 * Damaged Rook- "The builders have left it in a state of abandonment."


 * Charlie (the darkness monster)- "Charlie? Is that you? It's me! Maxwell!"


 * Charlie (attacked by)- "OW Charlie! That hurt."


 * Hound- "They don't recognise me!"


 * Red Hound- "I put fire gems in there as a joke."


 * Blue Hound- "I had a lot of surplus gems!"


 * Hound's Tooth- "This could be used for fashion."


 * Spider- "It's mostly digestive system."


 * Spider (sleeping)- "Sssh! It will wake up hungry."


 * Spider (dead)- "Haha!"


 * Spider Warrior- "It's a specialized form."


 * Spider Warrior (sleeping)- "I don't want to wake that one."


 * Spider Warrior (dead)- "Good riddance!"
 * Spider Gland- "Distasteful."


 * Silk- "Despite it's origin, it could make some fine garments."


 * Krampus- "You won't catch me!"


 * Krampus Sack- "It's really light."
 * Merm- "They were here when I got here."


 * Tentacle- "I'm glad the rest of it is down there."


 * Tentacle Spike- "Ugh. This is so revolting."


 * Tentacle Spots- "This is how they reproduce."


 * Big Tentacle (Tentapillar)- "This one is odd."


 * Baby Tentacle- "Babies?"
 * Pig Guard- "Blech. Disgusting brute."
 * Werepig- "That one's gone feral."
 * Ghost- "It remembers me!"


 * MacTusk- "Don't you recognise me?."


 * Wee MacTusk- "A chip off the old block."


 * Walrus Tusk- "I'll put this to better use."


 * Tam o' Shanter- "Made in Scotland."


 * Mosquito- "Bloody blood sucking blood suckers."


 * Mosquito (picked up)- "I got him."
 * Nearby Mosquitoes-


 * Cave Spider- "It's a tricky one."


 * Spitter- "Aggressive little thing, isn't it?
 * Batilisk- "Ugh. Ugly beasts."
 * Snurtle- "That's strange. That must be new."


 * Slurtle- "I don't remember that being down here."


 * Slurtle Slime- "There must be a better way."


 * Broken Shell- "They don't fit back together."


 * Lureplant- "A vicious plant."


 * Fleshy Bulb- "Perhaps I can use this to my advantage."


 * Eye Plant- "The meat bulb's pawns."
 * Slurper- "Simple creatures. They exist only to sleep and feed."
 * Ancient Guardian- "My my, the fuel has changed you."
 * Dangling Depth Dweller- "Creatures in this world evolve at a terrifying rate."

Mobs - Neutral Animals

 * Beefalo- "Just look at that stupid beast."
 * Beefalo (haunter)-


 * Beefalo (sleeping)- "It's only marginally less stupid when it's asleep."


 * Beefalo (shaved)- "Now it looks dumb AND pathetic."


 * Beefalo Wool- "It smells like a barn."


 * Beefalo Horn- "Call forth the beasts!"


 * Baby Beefalo- "They're even ugly as children."
 * Baby Beefalo (sleeping)- "They're even ugly as children."
 * Nearby Bees-


 * Bee- "They work so hard, the fools."


 * Bee (picked up)- "Now what do I do with it?"


 * Killer Bee- "What is that bee so angry about?"


 * Killer bee (picked up)- "I've caught a tiger by the tail."


 * Stinger- "It's dripping with venom."


 * Pig- "What a slobbering fool."


 * Pig (following)- "He's simple but he's mine."


 * Pig Skin- "It was him or me."


 * Bunnyman- "It reminds me of my old act."
 * Beardlord- "It reminds me of my old act."


 * Bunny Puff- "Silly rabbit."


 * Frog- "It jumps and licks things."


 * Frog (sleeping)- "It looks tired."


 * Koalefant- "A distant cousin of the beefalo."


 * Winter Koalefant- "It has its winter coat on."


 * Rock Lobster- "I banished these guys down here for a reason."
 * Pengull- "Nice tux."
 * Splumonkey- "I don't have time for you!"

Mobs - Passive Animals

 * Butterfly- "It's a flying flower."


 * Butterfly (picked up)- "It would be a shame if someone ripped the wings off you."


 * Crow- "I don't know how they got here."


 * Crow (picked up)- "Shhhh... My pretty."


 * Jet Feather- "Black is the colour of sleep."


 * Redbird- "The redbird comes from the firelands."


 * Redbird (picked up)- "Silence, bird!"


 * Crimson Feather- "Red is the color of fire."


 * Snow bird- "I don't recognise that one."


 * Snowbird (picked up)- "Quiet, you."


 * Azure Feather- "Grey is the colour of pain."


 * Gobbler- "It's addicted to fermented berries."


 * Eye Bone- "Stop looking at me!"


 * Eye Bone (Chester dead, eye closed)-  "What is it waiting for?"


 * Ashes of Eye Bone-


 * Chester- "Annoying little monster. He has his uses, though."


 * Rabbit- "I've been here too long - It actually looks tasty."


 * Rabbit (picked up)- "Don't worry, rabbit. Everything is under control."
 * Beardling- "I've been here too long - It actually looks tasty."
 * Beardling (picked up)- "Don't worry, rabbit. Everything is under control."


 * Fireflies- "How pretty."


 * Fireflies (picked up)- "I could squish them if I wanted to."


 * Mandrake- "Oh shut UP, will you?"


 * Mandrake (following)- "What a disturbing root."


 * Mandrake (dead)- "My ears are still ringing."


 * Mandrake (cooked)- "It has lost a lot of its power."
 * Mandrake (knocked out by Mandrake)- "Ugh, my head hurts."

Mobs - Tallbird family

 * Tallbird- "These were a failed experiment."


 * Tallbird Nest (empty)- "It's made of dirty beefalo hair."


 * Tallbird Nest (with egg)- "Well. That's tempting."


 * Tallbird Egg- "Tallbirds are territorial because of these things."


 * Tallbird Egg (cooked)-" It tastes like broken dreams."


 * Hatching Tallbird Egg- "We've got a live one here."


 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (dead, eating the egg)- "That tastes about as good as you would expect."


 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (too hot)- "Hot enough for ya?"


 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (too cold)- "It's getting tepid."


 * Smallbird- "What!? What do you want?"


 * Smallbird (hungry)- "You want some food?"


 * Smallbird (starving)- "He's so hungry!"


 * Smallish Tallbird- "It's less cute now that it's grown up."


 * Smallish Tallbird (hungry)-  "They sure do eat a lot!"


 * Smallish Tallbird (starving, attacking)-  "A hungry beast is a dangerous beast!"
 * Pecked by a Smallish Tallbird-

Mobs - Bosses

 * Treeguard (Leif)- "Disgusting creature!"


 * Living Logs- "I like the sound they make when they burn."


 * Spider Queen- "Maybe I'll just get out of her way."


 * Spiderhat- "Spiders have such malleable wills."


 * Deerclops- "Even I am afraid of that guy."


 * Deerclops Eyeball- "Deerclops are myopic."

Mobs - Other

 * Maxwell- "Lookin good!"


 * Pig King- "That's a man with his priorities in order!"
 * Wes (trapped)- "He displeased me."


 * Abigail- "Why won't just these mortals stay dead?"

Food - Meats

 * Bird Egg- "I like to think of it as a baby bird prison."
 * Bird Egg (cooked)- "Sunny side up."
 * Rotten Egg- "Disgusting. Why am I carrying this around?"
 * Monster Meat- "How revolting."


 * Cooked Monster Meat- "I'll eat it if I have to."


 * Monster Jerky- "My teeth are getting too old for this."


 * Meat- "I'm used to much finer fare."


 * Cooked Meat- "It smells less like barnyard, now."


 * Leafy Meat- "A feeble attempt to trick the weaker minded."


 * Cooked Leafy Meat- "The heat has made this a suitable meal."


 * Jerky- "My teeth are getting too old for this."


 * Drumstick- "It tastes strangely like berries."


 * Fried Drumstick- "Still tastes like berries."


 * Fish- "Fresh from the murky depths."


 * Cooked Fish- "It still stinks"


 * Morsel- "This is barely a mouthful."


 * Cooked Morsel- "Well, at least it's not moving anymore"
 * Small Jerky- "My teeth are getting too old for this."


 * Koalefant Trunk- "Full of summer mucus."


 * Winter Koalefant Trunk- "The trunk thickens in the winter to hold more mucus."


 * Koalefant Trunk Steak- "At least the mucus burned off."


 * Frog Legs- "Muscular."


 * Cooked Frog Legs- "Stringy."


 * Batilisk Wing- "I'm not eating that."


 * Cooked Batilisk Wing- "I'm still not eating that."

Food - Fruits

 * Pomegranate- "Usually I'd get someone to seed this for me"


 * Sliced Pomegranate- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Durian- "It's an aquired taste."


 * Extra Smelly Durian- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Dragon Fruit- "Exotic and delicious."


 * Prepared Dragon Fruit- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Berries- "Sigh, if I have to."


 * Roasted Berries- "A little more refined, at least"


 * Cave Banana- "Like ashes in my mouth."


 * Cooked Banana- "Even worse than raw."

Food - Vegetables

 * Corn- "High in fructose."


 * Popcorn- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Carrot (in the ground)- "How mundane."


 * Carrot (picked up)- "I'm not a fan of vegetables."


 * Roasted Carrot- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Pumpkin- "Halloween was always my favourite."


 * Hot Pumpkin- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Eggplant- "Just another boring plant."


 * Braised Eggplant- "A little more refined, at least."


 * Red Mushroom- "I forget what this one does."


 * Cooked Red Cap- "Kind of bitter."


 * Green Mushroom- "I should eat it."


 * Cooked Green Cap- "Salty!"


 * Blue Mushroom-  "What could go wrong?"


 * Cooked Blue Cap- "Umami!"

Food - Crock Pot

 * Turkey Dinner- "How festive."


 * Powdercake- "What foul product of science is this?"


 * Most recipes- "My compliments to the chef!"

Food - Other

 * Seeds- "I suppose these won't plant themselves."


 * Seeds (specific)- "This labour is beneath me."


 * Roasted Seeds- "I broiled the life out of 'em."


 * Honey- "Sticky and sweet."


 * Butterfly Wings- "Ha ha ha. I got him!"


 * Butter- "Some puns are irresistible."


 * Rot- "That used to be food until I wasted it."
 * Red Mushroom (picked)- "I forget what that one does."
 * Red Mushroom (cooked)- "Kind of bitter."
 * Green Mushroom (picked)- "I should eat it."
 * Green Mushroom (cooked)- "Salty!"


 * Blue Mushroom (picked)- "What could go wrong?"


 * Blue Mushroom (cooked)- "Umami!"

Misc Items

 * Blueprint- "I know all about that. I just forgot."
 * Gears- "My pets! What has become of you?"
 * Ash- "A fine powder that smells of destruction."
 * Red Gem- "Red brings fire."
 * Blue Gem- "Blue brings ice."
 * Yellow Gem- "I can feel the magic in this."
 * Orange Gem- "It will be quite powerful with some fuel."


 * Beard Hair- "Hirsute."


 * Manure- "It's the way of all mortal life."


 * Guano- "Disgusting!"


 * Melty Marbles - "This was important to someone once."


 * Fake Kazoo -  "This was inportant to someone once."


 * Gord's Knot - "This was important to someone once."


 * Gnome -  "This was important to someone once."


 * Tiny Rocketship - "This was important to someone once."


 * Frazzled Wires -  "This was important to someone once."


 * Ball and Cup - "This was important to someone once."


 * Hardened Rubber Bung -  "This was important to someone once."


 * Mismatched Buttons - "This was important to someone once."


 * Second-hand Dentures - "This was important to someone once."


 * Lying Robot - "This was important to someone once."


 * Dessicated Tentacle - "This was important to someone once."

Adventure Mode

 * Failed- "I of all people should be able to do this."
 * Obelisk that is down while sane (sane, down)- "It only half-exists on this plane"
 * Obelisk that is down while sane (insane, up)- "I can see its true nature now!"
 * Obelisk that is up while sane (sane, up)- "I can see its true nature now!"
 * Obelisk that is up while sane (insane, down)- "There are two ways to see that obstacle."
 * Divining Rod (in its starting base)- "The portals lead to the next rod. "
 * Divining Rod- "I can use this to find my missing parts."
 * Divining Rod (cold)- "Mostly just background noise."
 * Divining Rod (warm)- "This is the right direction."
 * Divining Rod (warmer)- "I should keep my eyes peeled."
 * Divining Rod (hot)- "It must be right under my nose!"
 * Divining Rod Base- It's the starting mechanism."
 * Divining Rod Base (ready to unlock)-
 * Divining Rod Base (unlocked)-
 * Maxwell's Door- "So that's where I left that thing."
 * Maxwell's Phonograph- "That accursed thing!"
 * Maxwell's Light- "I wonder how they work."
 * Maxwell's Toothtrap- "I'm sure I had my reasons when I placed this."
 * Maxwell's Mosquito Trap- "Maybe I shouldn't have put that there. "
 * Sick Wormhole- "It looks ill."
 * Nightmare Lock- "It keeps the master in the chair."
 * Nightmare Throne- "It's less painful than it looks. Barely."
 * Other character on Nightmare Throne- "Better him than me."

Announcements

 * Battlecry- "To arms!"


 * Battlecry (prey)- "You look tasty!"
 * Battlecry (Pig)- "Brains over brawn!"


 * Leaving combat- "And stay away!"


 * Leaving combat (prey)-  "You're not worth my time!"


 * Leaving combat (Pig)- "Next time, pig!"


 * Dusk- "It'll be dark soon. Charlie will be waking up."


 * Entering light- "The light is back."


 * Entering darkness- "It's dark! I can't see!"


 * Doing things in the dark-


 * Failed to do something- "That didn't work."


 * Failed to craft something-  "Er... I can't do that."


 * Trying to sleep during the day- "I can't sleep in the day."
 * Trying to sleep when too hungry-"I'm too hungry. I can't sleep."


 * Trying to sleep near monsters- "Not while there's danger afoot!"


 * Hounds are coming-  "The hounds are getting restless."
 * Deerclops is coming- "I hear the deerclops."


 * Inventory full- "My pockets are full."


 * Eating (spoiled food)- "That was putrid."


 * Eating (stale food)-  "That was past its due-date."


 * Eating (painful food)-  "Ow! That hurt my mouth."


 * Hungry- "I am empty inside."
 * Earthquake- "That doesn't sound good."

Unimplemented

 * Maxwell Head- "Hey, handsome."
 * Deadly Feast- "It's a... thing."
 * Skull Chest- "That's one snazzy chest."

Trivia

 * "Not the bees!" Is probably a reference to a famous Nicholas Cage movie, "The Wicker Man."