Woodie quotes

"It's nothing a good chopping wouldn't fix."

- Woodie

This page lists all of Woodie's Character quotes which are spoken when the player examines an in-game item or object. The player can alt-click items and objects to examine them.

TabTools.png

 * Axe- "It's not as nice as Lucy."
 * Luxury Axe- "It's almost as nice as Lucy."
 * Lucy the Axe- "I love Lucy!"
 * Shovel- "Dig a hole. Plant a tree!"
 * Regal Shovel- "Time to dig golden holes."
 * Pickaxe- "Almost an axe, but not quite."
 * Opulent Pickaxe- "It's pretty but can't chop down trees."
 * Razor- "A true lumberjack never shaves."
 * Razor (can't shave)- "You can't shave what's not hair".
 * Razor (nothing left)- "It's already shorn, eh?"
 * Razor (shaving a waken beefalo)- "I'm not going to try this while he's awake."
 * Hammer- "Everyone makes mistakes, eh?"
 * Pitchfork- "This really isn't my style."

TabLight.png

 * Campfire (upon being built)- "Where's my guitar?"
 * Campfire (high)- "Uh oh! It's bit high!"
 * Campfire (normal)- "I love a fire in the evening."
 * Campfire (low)- "I should probably do something about that, eh?"
 * Campfire (embers)- "It's almost gone."
 * Campfire (burned out)- "It was good while it lasted."
 * Fire Pit (upon being built)- "It uses wood."
 * Fire Pit (high)- "I'm using too much wood too fast!"
 * Fire Pit (normal)- "Mmmm. Smells woody."
 * Fire Pit (low)- "There should be some wood around here somewhere."
 * Fire Pit (embers)- "I should go chop some wood for that, eh?"
 * Fire Pit (burned out)- "If only I had some wood."
 * Torch- "Trees by torchlight."
 * Torch (run out)- "My light ran out!"
 * Miner Hat- "Down deep in a coal mine."
 * Miner Hat (run out)- "My mining days are over."


 * Pumpkin Lantern- "It better not tip over."
 * Lantern- "High tech!"

TabSurvival.pngval

 * Backpack- "That's my rucksack."
 * Piggyback- "I used all parts of the pig."
 * Bird Trap- "I'll show those birds yet!"
 * Bug Net- "It can collect skeeters."
 * Fishing Rod- "I should spend some time at the lake."
 * Straw Roll- "I've slept on worse back at the lumber camp."
 * Fur Roll- "I love camping."
 * Tent- "I'm used to sleeping in worse."
 * Trap- "Work smarter, eh?"
 * Honey Poultice- "At least I didn't have to pay for it."
 * Healing Salve- "Healthiness in goo form."
 * Heat Stone- "We call those 'night rocks' back home."
 * Heat Stone (cold)- "It's gone cold, eh?"
 * Heat Stone (warm)- "It's getting a bit dimmer."
 * Heat Stone (hot)- "I could chop all winter with that in my pocket!"
 * Umbrella- "This will keep my beard dry, eh?"
 * Compass- "True north."

TabFood.png

 * Crock Pot- "It seems a waste to just leave it sitting there empty."
 * Crock Pot (cooking, long time left)- "It'll be a bit longer, eh?"
 * Crock Pot (cooking, short time left)- "Oh boy! Here it comes!"
 * Crock Pot (finished)- "Time for supper!"
 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm- "I prefer larger plants."
 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm (growing)- "Watched plants never grow."
 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm (needs fertillizer)- "I think it needs some poop."
 * Ice Box- "Ahhhh. Reminds me of home."
 * Drying Rack- "It's set up... just add meat."
 * Drying Rack (drying)- "This is like watching meat dry."
 * Drying Rack (finished)- "That looks done."

TabScience.pngce

 * Science Machine- "I don't trust all this science stuff."
 * Alchemy Engine- "This is getting strange."
 * Winterometer- "We can build these half as tall back home."
 * Rainometer- "Rain makes the trees grow."
 * Lightning Rod- "Weather's not going to get the drop on me now."
 * Lightning Rod (charged)- "It's pretty like the northern lights."
 * Gunpowder- "Never did like this stuff."

TabFight.png

 * Spear- "It lacks the heft of a good solid axe."
 * Hambat- "What a waste of good ham."
 * Boomerang- "That looks hard to throw."
 * Boomerang (hit self)- "Sorry! Clumsy me!"
 * Blow Dart- " This seems a bit agressive."
 * Sleep Dart- "I can make my escape if I use this!"
 * Fire Dart- "This seems a bit more aggressive than the last one."
 * Football Helmet- "Will this give me hockey hair?"
 * Grass Suit- "It's better than nothing."
 * Logsuit- "It fits me so well!"
 * Marble Armor- "It's hard to swing an axe while wearing this."
 * Bee Mine- "I don't know if the bees like this."
 * Tooth Trap- "This seems a bit rough."
 * Shelmet- "This will keep my noggin safe."
 * Snurtle Shell Armor- "You can never be too safe."

TabStructures.pngtures

 * Bee Box- "Bees!"
 * Bee Box (no honey)- "I get hungry just looking at it."
 * Bee Box (some honey)- "I could get more if I waited."
 * Bee Box (full with honey)- "Honey!"
 * Birdcage- "It's where I try to make birds reform their evil ways."
 * Birdcage (occupied)- "Think about what you've done, bird!"
 * Birdcage (occupied, sleeping)- "They look so innocent when they dream."
 * Pig House- "A little duct tape would fix that right up."
 * Pig House (occupied and lights are off)- "Sorry! I'm not looking in!"
 * Pig House (occupied and lights are on)- "It's bacon - stuffed."
 * Hay Wall (inventory)- "I could sneeze it over."
 * Hay Wall (placed)- "I could sneeze it over."
 * Wood Wall (inventory)- "I like the look of that!"
 * Wood Wall (placed)- "I like the look of that!"
 * Stone Wall (inventory)- "Safe and secure, eh?"
 * Stone Wall (placed)- "Safe and secure, eh?"
 * Chest- "Wood is so handy! Look at all the things you can make!"
 * Chest (full)- "It's full, eh?"
 * Chest (not allowed to store, like backpack)- "That's not allowed, eh?
 * Sign- "Is there anything wood can't do?"

Wooden Flooring.png

 * Wooden Flooring- "Flooring fit for a king!"
 * Carpeted Flooring- "Too classy for my tastes"
 * Cobblestones- "Just some ground, eh?"
 * Checkerboard Flooring- "Looks like one of those city - people outhouses."
 * Turf- "Just some ground, eh?"

TabRefine.pnge

 * Rope- "Good for holding stuff to other stuff."
 * Boards- "So smooth. You can really see the grain."
 * Cut Stone- "Part of the Canadian shield."
 * Papyrus- "I'd rather chop than write."
 * Purple Gem- "It's nothing a good chopping wouldn't fix."
 * Nightmare Fuel- "All of me fears in liquid form, eh?"

TabMagic.png

 * Meat Effigy- "I look good in wood."
 * Prestihatitator- "I like to call it 'the hat machine'."
 * Shadow Manipulator- "OK, I kind of get it now."
 * Pan Flute- "I only sing for Lucy."
 * Night Light- "What kind of darkness is that?"
 * Night Armor- "It makes me queasy to look at."
 * Dark Sword- "Nightmares can't hurt ye!"
 * One-man Band- "I stand on guard for thee!"
 * Bat Bat- "A mouse with wings?"
 * Chilled Amulet- "Just need a beverage to cool now, eh?"
 * Nightmare Amulet- "The sparkle is gone from the gem."
 * Life Giving Amulet- "Always have a backup plan."
 * Fire Staff- "I don't trust this magic business."
 * Ice Staff- "It reminds me of home."
 * Telelocator Staff (1)- "Just another use for wood."
 * Telelocator Staff (2)- "I wonder what this thing does."
 * Telelocator Focus-

TabDress.png

 * Sewing Kit- "I'm pretty good at sewing."
 * Rabbit Earmuff- "Where I'm from these would only work in the fall."
 * Strawhat- "It will keep the sun off my head."
 * Beefalo Hat- "Now I'm the king of the beefalo!"
 * Beekeeper Hat- "This will keep the bees out of my eyes."
 * Feather Hat- "I don't want to wear that... thing."
 * Winter Hat- "It's a nice toque, eh?"
 * Top Hat- "It's too fancy."
 * Dapper Vest- "It's not plaid but it'll do."
 * Breezy Vest- "Nice and breezy"
 * Puffy Vest- "This could stand up to the winters back home, eh?"
 * Bush Hat- "It's good for hiding from nature."
 * Garland- "I think it looks nice with my red hair."
 * Walking Cane- "It's good for the back country."

Icon Ancient.pngnt

 * Thulecite Medallion (min)- "I think it's off."
 * Thulecite Medallion (rising low)- "This thing just turned on!"
 * Thulecite Medallion (rising high)- "It's vibrating!"
 * Thulecite Medallion (max)- "It's going crazy!"
 * Thulecite Medallion (receding high)- "It's settling down."
 * Thulecite Medallion (receding low)- "It's nearly still."
 * The Lazy Forager- "This'll make the chores go by quicker!"
 * Magiluminescence- "I could cut wood at night with this."
 * Construction Amulet- "I've always been better at cuttin' anyways."
 * The Lazy Explorer- "This will help me get around quickly."
 * Star Caller's Staff- "Useful in a pinch!"
 * Deconstruction Staff- "This'll help me dismantle stuff!"
 * Pick/Axe- "It's... it's beautiful."
 * Thulecite Crown- "It's no toque, but it'll do."
 * Thulecite Club- "Metal on a stick."
 * Thulecite Suit- "That'll stop the hurt."
 * Houndius Shootius- "This needs to be installed properly."
 * Houndius Shootius (placed)- "That'll drive the hosers off."

Totally Normal Tree.pnge - Plants

 * Evergreen- "It's calling to me!"
 * Evergreen (chopped)- "Ahhhh!"
 * Evergreen (burning)- "Nooo! I could have chopped it!"
 * Evergreen (burnt)- "What a waste."
 * Lumpy Evergreen- "Lucy would want me to chop it down."
 * Lumpy Evergreen (chopped)- "Another one!"
 * Lumpy Evergreen (burning)- "I'm sorry!"
 * Lumpy Evergreen (burnt)- "I feel terrible!"
 * Log- "It makes it all worthwhile."
 * Log (burning)- "Oh no! The fruits of my labour!"
 * Charcoal- "This makes me a bit sad."
 * Pinecone- "I should grow it and then chop it down!"
 * Baby Evergreen- "Here comes a tree!"
 * Spiky Tree- "Trees shouldn't fight back!"
 * Spiky Tree (chopped)- "It was a hard battle, but I won."
 * Spiky Tree (burning)- "That's what you get for being spiky!"
 * Spiky Tree (burnt)- "It deserved it."
 * Marble Tree- "Even Lucy can't chop that one down."
 * Totally Normal Tree- "I feel conflicted, eh?"
 * Living Log- "I am going to keep you, and call you Frank."
 * Sapling- "I want to see it grow so that I can chop it down."
 * Sapling (picked)- "Picking isn't as fun as chopping."
 * Sapling (burning)- "Aw! He barely had a chance!"
 * Sapling (picked up)- "Mmmmm. It's all twiggy."
 * Twigs- "I should build a tiny axe to chop these."
 * Grass Tuft- "Looks like kindling."
 * Grass Tuft (picked)- "It's gone all nubbly."
 * Grass Tuft (barren)- "I need to poop on it."
 * Grass Tuft (burning)- "I hope that doesn't spread to the trees."
 * Grass Tuft (picked up)- "It makes my eyes water."
 * Cut Grass- "I think I might be allergic to this."
 * Berry Bush- "Saskatoon berries?"
 * Berry Bush (picked)- "I didn't even share!"
 * Berry Bush (barren)- "It needs a good poopin'"
 * Berry Bush (burning)-
 * Berry Bush (picked up)- "Time for a little landscaping."
 * Reeds- "Reeds."
 * Reeds (picked)- "They'll be back."
 * Reeds (burning)- "Fire makes me nervous."
 * Cut Reeds- "Want to hear my loon call?"
 * Plant- "I wonder what it will be."
 * Plant (growing)- "A watched plant never grows."
 * Plant (ready to be picked)- "Time for grub."
 * Marsh Plant- "Plant."
 * Spiky Bush- "That's a bramble."
 * Spiky Bush (after picking it)- "Was that worth it?"
 * Spiky Bush (burning)- "Foomph!"
 * Flower- "That's nice."
 * Petals- "I wonder if Lucy would like these."
 * Evil Flower- "Something is wrong with that flower."
 * Dark Petals- "They're frowning at me with little evil faces."
 * Red Mushroom (unpicked)- "It's a red mushroom."
 * Green Mushroom (unpicked)- "It's a green mushroom."
 * Blue Mushroom (unpicked)- "I can never remember which ones you can eat."
 * Mushroom (unpicked, sleeping)- "They have their own schedule."
 * Mushroom (picked, the remains on the ground)- "I think I broke it."

Harp Statue.pnge - Objects

 * Bee Hive- "They're all comfy - cosy in there."
 * Killer Bee Hive- "Why are those bees so angry?"
 * Honeycomb- "I almost feel bad taking this."
 * Hound Mound- "I know better than to mess with that."
 * Bone- "It's covered with dog spit, eh?"
 * Touch Stone- "I don't know if I should touch it."
 * Harp Statue- "You lost your head, eh?"
 * Marble Pillar- "Somebody must have built that."
 * Marble- "Feels like a government building."
 * Merm House- "They're not the handiest."
 * Merm Head- "Smells like a factory trawler."
 * Pig Head- "What a waste of good pork."
 * Pig Torch- "How did they do that without thumbs?"
 * Basalt Boulder- "That rock ain't going to move."
 * Boulder- "I could break it down if I tried hard enough."
 * Rocks- "For the times when wood won't work."
 * Flint- "This could be an axe head."
 * Nitre- "It's how we build the railway."
 * Gold Nugget- "You can't make a coffee table out of gold. Well, maybe you can. But you shouldn't."
 * Headstone (1)- "It says milk. eggs. bacon"
 * Headstone (2)- "Here lies some guy. Blah blah blah."
 * Headstone (3)- "Hey, that's my name!"
 * Headstone (4)- "This headstone is blank."
 * Grave- "I should probably leave that alone."
 * Grave (dug)- "Sorry! Don't haunt me!"
 * Suspicious Dirt Pile- "Hey! A clue!"
 * Animal Tracks- "A large woodland creature passed this way!"
 * Animal Tracks (lost its trail)- "The beastie got away."
 * Animal Tracks (found)- "The beastie is nearby."
 * Wooden Thing- "It's a... magic thing, I think."
 * Wooden Thing (locked)- "There are bits missing, eh?"
 * Wooden Thing (partially assembled)- "It's almost ready, eh?"
 * Wooden Thing (fully assembled)- "Ready to go, eh?"
 * Ring Thing- "Ringy, eh?"
 * Crank Thing- "Cranky, eh?"
 * Box Thing- "Boxy, eh?"
 * Metal Potato Thing- "Potato - y, eh?"
 * Wormhole (closed)- "That looks like a bum!"
 * Wormhole (open)- "I'm not sure I want to look at that, eh?"
 * Wormhole (exited)- "It was gross in there!"
 * Pond- "I can't swim!"
 * Skeleton- "Sorry, friend."
 * Spider Den- "Holy Mackinaw! Look at that thing!"
 * Spider Egg- "Why would I want to carry that around?"
 * Rabbit Hole- "I doubt there are trees down there."
 * Walrus Camp- "Walruses are nearby, eh?"
 * Walrus Camp (Summer)- "This won't be safe come winter."

CaveEntrance1.pnge - Caves

 * Plugged Sinkhole- "It's bunged up."
 * Sinkhole- "It looks like Sudbury down there."
 * Rope to Surface- "There are probably trees up there."
 * Red Mushtree- "Maybe I should chop it."
 * Green Mushtree- "It's made of wood."
 * Blue Mushtree- "I can't let that stand."
 * Light Flower- "Shiny!"
 * Light Bulb- "I looks chewy." [sic]
 * Stalagmite- "I'm not too interested in rocks."
 * Stalagmite (pointy)- "I'm not too interested in rocks."
 * Spilagmite- "I should skedaddle before they come out of there."
 * Slurtle Mound- "Are you guys doing OK in there?"
 * Rabbit Hutch- "Is it carrot flavoured?"
 * Fern- "Hey! It's a fern!"
 * Foilage- "Looks like a salad."
 * Cave Banana Tree- "They don't have those back home."

Thulecite Fragments.pnge - Ruins

 * Ancient Statue- "Another hoser."
 * Broken Ancient Pseudoscience Station- "Looks a little worn out."
 * Ancient Pseudoscience Station- "There's axe marks on these altar stones."
 * Broken Clockworks- "Dead metal"
 * Relic- "Piece of furniture."
 * Cave Lichen- "Looks barely edible."
 * Ornate Chest- "What's in the box?!"
 * Nightmare Light- "They should have used wood."
 * Thulecite- "It's the wood of the caves!"
 * Thulecite Wall- "Crumbling but still secure, eh?"
 * Thulecite Wall (item)- "Heh, stoned again eh?"

Spider.png - Monsters

 * Clockwork Knight- "Maxwell's own mounted police."
 * Clockwork Bishop- "It's been a while since my last confession."
 * Clockwork Castle- "Hmm.. does the rook move in a straight line? I forget."
 * Damaged Bishop- "I can see the internal workings."
 * Damaged Rook- "The gears are spilling out."
 * Charlie (the darkness monster)- "Who's there, eh?"
 * Charlie (attacked by)- "Yeouch! That was rough!"
 * Hound- "They'd be good at pulling a sled."
 * Red Hound- "Hot hound!"
 * Blue Hound- "Arctic hounds?"
 * Hound's Tooth- "Beauty, eh?"
 * Spider- "That's the biggest spider I've ever seen!"
 * Spider (sleeping)- "Careful, now, eh?"
 * Spider (dead)-
 * Spider Warrior- "They come in yellow now, eh?"
 * Spider Warrior (sleeping)- "I don't want to wake it."
 * Spider Warrior (dead)-
 * Spider Gland- "I think it's poison."
 * Silk- "Spiders give me the willies."
 * Krampus- "Back off, hoser!"
 * Krampus Sack- "I feel bad taking someone else's sack."
 * Merm- "What foul sea did that crawl out of?"
 * Tentacle- "Are there squid down there?"
 * Tentacle Spike- "It wobbles when you wave it."
 * Tentacle Spots- "I'm blushing!"
 * Big Tentacle (Tentapillar)- "It's so big!"
 * Baby Tentacle- "Are those squid babies?"
 * Pig Guard- "I don't want to make him mad."
 * Werepig- "What happened to him?!"
 * Ghost- "Boo! Ha ha!"
 * MacTusk- "Oh no. Walruses again!"
 * Weetusk- "Why are they so far south?"
 * Walrus Tusk- "He had a cavity, eh?"
 * Tam 'o Shanter- "My grandad wore a hat like this."
 * Mosquito- "That'll take a pint out of me!"
 * Mosquito (picked up)- "What do I do with this, eh?"
 * Nearby Mosquitoes- "Skeeters!"
 * Cave Spider- "Tricky devil!"
 * Spitter- "Spitting is rude!"
 * Batilisk- "Who taught that rat to fly?"
 * Snurtle- "Spirals!"
 * Slurtle- "He's just misunderstood."
 * Slurtle Slime - "Someone needs a tissue."
 * Broken Shell- "I broke his home. I feel bad."
 * Lureplant- "Is that meat?"
 * Fleshy Bulb- "It's warm and lumpy."
 * Eye Plant- "It needs to mind its own business."
 * Slurper- "I think it's living hair."
 * Dangling Depth Dweller- "They're smart to live away from the corruption."
 * Depths Worm (emerged)- "WOOORM!"
 * Depths Worm (lure)- "I know a plant when I see one. This'n an impostor!"
 * Depths Worm (burrowed)- "Be wary the moving ground."

Pig.png - Neutral Animals

 * Beefalo- "He smells like a sod house."
 * Beefalo (following)- "I think he likes me."
 * Beefalo (sleeping)- "He's catching some zeds."
 * Beefalo (shaved)- "Cheer up, eh?"
 * Beefalo Wool- "It feels like my beard."
 * Beefalo Horn- "I don't know if I should put my mouth on that."
 * Baby Beefalo- "A face only a mother could love."
 * Baby Beefalo (sleeping)-
 * Nearby Bees- "Bees! Bees!"
 * Bee- "She's making the flowers grow."
 * Bee (picked up)- "Now what do I do with it?"
 * Killer Bee- "That bee doesn't seem as friendly."
 * Killer Bee (picked up)- "He's none to pleased with his situation."
 * Stinger- "Ouch! It's pointy."
 * Pig- "Walking back bacon!"
 * Pig (following)- "We're a team! Yah!"
 * Pig (sleeping)-
 * Pig Skin- "Bacon with tail."
 * Bunnyman- "He looks friendly enough."
 * Beardlord-
 * Bunny Puff- "I feel sorry for him."
 * Frog- "I don't trust anything that can't decide between air and water."
 * Frog (sleeping)- "It's tired."
 * Frog (dead)- "Ex - frog."
 * Koalefant- "He looks tasty."
 * Winter Koalefant- "They get tastier in the winter."
 * Rock Lobster- "Lobster supper time!"
 * Pengull- "Take off! To the Great White North! Beauty."
 * Splumonkey- "Well then. That's a new one."

Rabbit.png - Passive Animals

 * Butterfly- "I never trusted those things, eh?"
 * Butterfly (picked up)- "Where are you going to run?"
 * Crow- "He's planning something. I can tell."
 * Crow (picked up)- "You'll pay for your crimes, crow!"
 * Jet Feather- "A gross feather."
 * Redbird- "What a snotty little jerk."
 * Redbird (picked up)- "Don't get comfortable, birdie."
 * Crimson Feather- "A disgusting feather."
 * Snowbird- "Go fly south or something!"
 * Snowbird (picked up)- "It's stealing my warmth."
 * Azure Feather- "A stupid feather."
 * Gobbler- "More birds! Why is it always birds?"
 * Eye Bone- "No one ever told him it was rude to stare."
 * Eye Bone (Chester dead, eye closed)- "I wonder if it will ever wake up again."
 * Ashes of Eye Bone- "This used to be an eyebone."
 * Chester- "He's doing his best!"
 * Rabbit- "Dang ground squirrels..."
 * Rabbit (picked up)- "I'd feel bad eating him."
 * Beardling-
 * Beardling (picked up)-
 * Fireflies- "Reminds me of Algonquin park."
 * Fireflies (picked up)- "I've got a pocket full of sunshine!"
 * Mandrake- "What have I done?"
 * Mandrake (following)- "It's looking at me."
 * Mandrake (dead)- "Sorry, little guy."
 * Mandrake (cooked 1)- "Sorry!"
 * Mandrake (cooked 2)- "Was that a bad thing to do?"
 * Mandrake (knocked out by)- "Ow. What was that?"

Smallbird.png - Tallbird Family

 * Tallbird- "I don't trust birds that can't fly, either."
 * Tallbird Nest (empty)- "Nothing there"
 * Tallbird Nest (with egg)- "I should steal its egg to teach it a lesson." [sic]
 * Tallbird Egg- "What's in here?"
 * Tallbird Egg (cooked)- "It tastes like justice."
 * Hatching Tallbird Egg- "It's hatching."
 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (dead, eating the egg)- "You can taste the beak, eh?"
 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (too hot)- "Is it crying?"
 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (too cold)- "Too cold for you?"
 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (long time left)- "Birds are never prompt."
 * Hatching Tallbird Egg (short time left)- "Any time now."
 * Smallbird- "What do you want?"
 * Smallbird (hungry)- "It wants something."
 * Smallbird (starving)- "I think it's starving."
 * Smallish Tallbird- "It's growing up to be a jerk, just like its parents."
 * Smallish Tallbird (hungry)- "Are you ALWAYS hungry?"
 * Smallish Tallbird (starving)- "It getting wild with hunger."
 * Pecked by a Smallish Tallbird- "Sorry! I'll try harder!"

Treeguard.png - Bosses

 * Treeguard (Leif)- "I'm sorry about all of those trees!"
 * Spider Queen- "You're not my queen!"
 * Spider Hat- "She's a real beaut, ain't she?" [sic]
 * Deerclops- "That's a big moose!"
 * Deerclops Eyeball- "Now what is this good for?"
 * Ancient Guardian- "Another poor soul with a curse."
 * Guardian's Horn- "That's a nice horn, eh."

Abigail build.png Mobs - Other

 * Maxwell- "Why does he hate me?"
 * Pig King-  "He's not MY king."
 * Wes (trapped)- "Who's that hoser?"
 * Abigail-

Meat.png - Meats

 * Bird Egg- "There's a bird in there thinking evil bird thoughts."
 * Bird Egg (cooked)- "Well, at least it never became a bird."
 * Monster Meat- "I'm not hungry enough for that."
 * Cooked Monster Meat- "I still don't want to eat it."
 * Monster Jerky- "I still don't want to eat it."
 * Meat- "Tastes like moose."
 * Cooked Meat- "Just like my dear old ma used to make."
 * Leafy Meat- "That's gross!"
 * Cooked Leafy Meat- "Cooking didn't help much"
 * Jerky- "It tastes like survival."
 * Drumstick- "October food."
 * Fried Drumstick- "Thanks, turkey."
 * Fish- "Looks like a cod."
 * Cooked Fish- "I wish I had some chips."
 * Morsel- "I wish this were bigger."
 * Cooked Morsel- "That'll just make me hungrier!"
 * Small Jerky- "Just a bite."
 * Koalefant Trunk- "It's pretty thin."
 * Winter Koalefant Trunk- "It's thick and hairy."
 * Koalefant Trunk Steak- "I think it boiled off all of the nose cheese."
 * Frog Legs- "They're still jumping!"
 * Cooked Frog Legs- "At least they stopped moving."
 * Batilisk Wing- "Gross!"
 * Cooked Batilisk Wing- "Gross! And tasty! So confusing!"

Dragon Fruit.png - Fruits

 * Pomegranate- "That's too fancy for me."
 * Sliced Pomegranate- "This would go good on flapjacks."
 * Durian- "It smells bad."
 * Extra Smelly Durian- "It smells even worse."
 * Dragon Fruit- "I've never seen one of those before."
 * Prepared Dragon Fruit- "It tastes like maple syrup."
 * Berries- "I have a heartier appetite than that."
 * Roasted Berries- "Tastes like warm berries."
 * Cave Banana- "It tastes tropical."
 * Cooked Banana- "I cooked it."

Carrot.png - Vegetables

 * Corn- "I like it, but not in everything that I eat."
 * Popcorn- "Cooked with the goodness of corn."
 * Carrot (in the ground)- "I'm not one for vegetables, eh?"
 * Carrot (picked up)- "That's rabbit food."
 * Roasted Carrot- "That's rabbit food."
 * Pumpkin- "I don't like to eat things that grow on the ground."
 * Hot Pumpkin- "Pies are good."
 * Eggplant- "I bet birds have something to do with this."
 * Braised Eggplant- "Suspiciously birdy."
 * Red Cap- "I don't know..."
 * Cooked Red Cap- "Only if I get really hungry."
 * Green Cap- "I've eaten stranger things in the woods."
 * Cooked Green Cap- "I don't trust it."
 * Blue Cap- "That's not meat."
 * Cooked Blue Cap- "That's not meat."
 * Glow Berry- "This thing will be useful."

Ratatouille.png - Crock Pot

 * Bacon and Eggs- "Awww. It's just front bacon."
 * Butter Muffin- "Crunchy!"
 * Dragonpie- "Almost as good as butter tarts!"
 * Fishsticks- "Elegant dining in a box."
 * Fish Tacos- "Tastes like the sea, eh?"
 * Fist Full of Jam- "Now to find peanut butter."
 * Froggle Bunwich- "You can really taste the swamp."
 * Fruit Medley- "In syrup!"
 * Honey Ham- "But it's not a holiday..."
 * Honey Nuggets- "One of my favourite meals!"
 * Kabobs- "The stick really adds to the flavour."
 * Mandrake Soup- "It's a tiring soup."
 * Meaty Stew- "Sticks to your ribs."
 * Meatballs- "All the meats!"
 * Monster Lasagna- "This is cat food!"
 * Pierogi- "I call them "yum pockets"."
 * Powdercake- "I like the ones made with real sugar better."
 * Pumpkin Cookie- "This will keep me chopping."
 * Ratatouille- " I cooked it myself!"
 * Stuffed Eggplant-"I'm getting better at cooking."
 * Taffy- "Sugary good."
 * Turkey Dinner- "Turkey day is here again!"
 * Unagi- "It'll fill ya up."
 * Waffles- "I prefer flapjacks."
 * Wet Goop- "Better than some things I've eaten!"

Rot.png - Other

 * Seeds- "Not trees."
 * Seeds (Carrot)- "Tiny carrots."
 * Seeds (Corn)- "I'm more of a hewer of wood than a tiller of soil."
 * Seeds (Dragonfruit)- "Maybe I can grow more."
 * Seeds (Durian)- "Why would I want to grow more of those things."
 * Seeds (Eggplant)- "Hmmm. I'm not sure."
 * Seeds (Pomegranate)- "Seedy."
 * Seeds (Pumpkin)- "It's a seed."
 * Roasted Seeds- "We call this 'lumberjack surprise'."
 * Honey- "Mmmmmm-mmmm. Bee syrup."
 * Butterfly Wings- "I'm sorry! I'm a terrible person!"
 * Butter- "I prefer margarine."
 * Rot- "Aw, it's Diefenbakered."
 * Rotten Egg- "One less bird. Good."

Trinkets.png Items

 * Blueprint- "I'm not one for book learning."
 * Gears- "I never could figure these things out."
 * Ash- "It all burnt up."
 * Red Gem- "I see within it the fiery death of a thousand trees."
 * Blue Gem- "It's very cold."
 * Yellow Gem- "I can see the stars in it."
 * Green Gem- "How flashy."
 * Orange Gem- "It's shimmering."
 * Beard Hair- "These aren't from me."
 * Manure- "Don't poop in camp!"
 * Guano- "It stinks less than the other kind."
 * Melty Marbles- "I used to play that game."
 * Fake Kazoo- "Not the real thing, eh?"
 * Gord's Knot- "Reminds me of a story I heard once."
 * Gnome- "Don't ask me."
 * Tiny Rocketship- "I needs a robot arm, eh?" [sic]
 * Frazzled Wires- "They're not good any more, eh?"
 * Ball and Cup- "I could play this for hours!"
 * Hardened Rubber Bung- "If I find a tub, I'm all set."
 * Mismatched Buttons- "I just sew my clothing shut around me when I put it on."
 * Second-hand Dentures- "Choppers for old folks."
 * Lying Robot- "Quiet, you!"
 * Dessicated Tentacle- "It's all withered."

Maxwell Head.pngture Mode

 * Failed- "Oh well. I gave it a good try."
 * Obelisk that is down while sane (sane, down)- "That makes sense."
 * Obelisk that is down while sane (insane, up)- "I don't know how to move that."
 * Obelisk that is up while sane (sane, up)- "Something is off about that rock, eh?"
 * Obelisk that is up while sane (insane, down)- "Where did it go?!"
 * Ashes of Divining Rod- "I guess that doesn't go through there."
 * Divining Rod (before picked up from its starting base)- "That's a weird looking rod."
 * Divining Rod- "I wonder if it gets the hockey game."
 * Divining Rod (cold)- "It's really fuzzy from here."
 * Divining Rod (warm)- "I think I'm getting closer."
 * Divining Rod (warmer)- "Woah, careful there, bud."
 * Divining Rod (hot)- "Loud and clear! Something's near!"
 * Divining Rod Base- "I looks like something plugs in."
 * Divining Rod Base (ready to unlock)- "It's ready to be unlocked."
 * Divining Rod Base (unlocked)- "Now all it needs is to be turned on."
 * Maxwell's Door- "I wonder if that's the way out of here."
 * Maxwell's Phonograph- "Better than most of the stuff on the radio."
 * Maxwell's Light- "That's unnatural."
 * Maxwell Statue- "He's kind of a jerk, eh?"
 * Maxwell's Tooth Trap- "He's not playing fair, eh?"
 * Maxwells Tooth Trap (went off)-
 * Beemine (Maxwell's)- Hey! "That's just mean!"
 * Sick Wormhole- "It smells a bit off, eh?"
 * Nightmare Lock- "Where is the key?"
 * Nightmare Throne- "I've seen nicer chairs."
 * Male character on Nightmare Throne- "Do you need help?"
 * Female character on Nightmare Throne- "She's trapped!"
 * Other character on Nightmare Throne- "It's trapped!"

Gramophone.pngncements

 * Generic- "What's that, eh?"
 * Freezing- "It's cold out here!"
 * Turning Winter-
 * Battlecry- "Get over here, eh!"
 * Activated a Bee Mine- "Bees! Bees!"
 * Leaving Combat- "I think that's enough."
 * Dusk- "It's almost my bedtime."
 * Entering Light- "Brilliance!"
 * Entering Darkness- "Who turned out the lights?"
 * Doing things in the dark- "It's dark, eh!"
 * Failed to do something- "Sorry, I can't do that."
 * Failed to craft something- "I can't do that right now."
 * Trying to sleep during the day- "Only a hoser sleeps during the day."
 * Trying to sleep when too hungry- "My belly is too empty to fall asleep."
 * Trying to sleep near monsters- "It's too scary out to sleep."
 * Hounds are coming- "There's something out there."
 * Deerclops is coming- "What was that?"
 * Inventory Full- "I can't carry any more kit."
 * Eating- "Tasty!"
 * Eating (spoiled food)- "That was a wee bit manky."
 * Eating (stale food)- "I got to that one just in time."
 * Eating (painful food)- "That was past the expiry date."
 * Hungry- "I'm getting peckish."
 * Earthquake- "The ground is heaving!"

Lucy the Axe.png the Axe quotes

 * Equipped (1)- "Let's chop some trees!"
 * Equipped (2)- "Nice day for a walk!"
 * Equipped (3)- "We make a good team!"
 * Equipped (4)- "There must be some trees around here somewhere."
 * Equipped (5)- "Woodie! Chop some trees!"
 * Equipped (6)- "All work and no play makes me want to chop trees."
 * Equipped (7)- "Chop chop chop. Heh."
 * On Ground (1)- "Come back! Take me with you!"
 * On Ground (2)- "Where did you go?"
 * On Ground (3)- "Take me with you!"
 * On Ground (4)- "What if I get stolen?"
 * In Container (1)- "It's dark in here!"
 * In Container (2)- "I'm scared!"
 * In Container (3)- "I can't see anything!"
 * In Container (4)- "I hate it in here."
 * Other Owner (1)- "You're not Woodie!"
 * Other Owner (2)- "Put me down!"
 * Dropped (1)- "You'll come back right?"
 * Dropped (2)- "What did I say?"
 * Dropped (3)- "I... don't understand!"
 * Dropped (4)- "Can we talk about this?"
 * Dropped (5)- "Don't forget about me!"
 * Chopped (1)- "Woooooo!"
 * Chopped (2)- "Yeah!"
 * Chopped (3)- "Stupid tree!"
 * Chopped (4)- "Nom nom nom!"
 * Chopped (5)- "We did it!"
 * Chopped (6)- "This is AWESOME!"
 * Chopped (7)- "Death to all trees!"
 * Chopped (8)- "Again! Let's chop another!"
 * Chopped (9)- "Nice swing!"
 * Chopped (10)- "Too easy!"
 * Beaver Low (1)- "Are you OK?"
 * Beaver Low (2)- "You look distracted, Woodie."
 * Beaver Low (3)- "Calm down! It's just a tree!"
 * Beaver Mid (1)- "Woodie? Can you hear me?"
 * Beaver Mid (2)- "You might want to slow down a bit."
 * Beaver Mid (3)- "Careful, you're getting yourself worked up!"
 * Beaver Mid (4)- "Don't chop too fast. You know what will happen!"
 * Beaver High (1)- "Woodie! Be careful!"
 * Beaver High (2)- "It's starting!"
 * Beaver High (3)- "You're not looking so good!"
 * Beaver High (4)- "Your teeth are growing!"
 * Beaver High (5)- "Watch out! You're going to turn!"
 * Beaver Back Down (1)- "That was a close one!"
 * Beaver Back Down (2)- "I think we'll be alright."
 * Beaver Back Down (3)- "You're looking much better now."
 * Beaver Back Down (4)- "It's passed. For now."
 * Beaver Back Down (5)- "It's back in the lodge. Phew."
 * Transformation To Beaver (1)- "Oh no!"
 * Transformation To Beaver (2)- "It happened again!"
 * Transformation To Beaver (3)- "The curse!"
 * Transformation To Beaver (4)- "I warned you!"
 * Transformation To Beaver (5)- "Woodie!"
 * Transform Back To Woodie (1)- "You're back!"
 * Transform Back To Woodie (2)- "Quick! Pick me up!"
 * Transform Back To Woodie (3)- "Are you OK?"
 * Transform Back To Woodie (4)- "Don't let that happen again!"
 * Transform Back To Woodie (5)- "Everything is going to be fine. Just focus."

Unimplemented

 * DEVTOOL- "I'm not commenting on that."
 * UNIMPLEMENTED- "It doesn't look safe."
 * ANNOUNCE_FREEDOM- "I got out!"
 * ANNOUNCE_NO_TRAP- "Close one!"
 * BOAT- "Must have hit a nor'easter."
 * SKULLCHEST- "That's scary!"
 * TREASURECHEST_TRAP- "Something is not quite right about that chest."

TabLight.png

 * Endothermic Fire- "Where's my electric guitar?"
 * Endothermic Fire (high)- "Uh oh! It's bit high!"
 * Endothermic Fire (medium)- "I love a cold fire in the evening."
 * Endothermic Fire (low)- "I should probably do something about that, eh?"
 * Endothermic Fire (embers)- "It's almost gone."
 * Endothermic Fire (out)- "It was good while it lasted."
 * Endothermic Fire Pit- "It uses wood."
 * Endothermic Fire Pit (high)- "I'm using too much wood too fast!"
 * Endothermic Fire Pit (medium)- "Mmmm. Smells woody."
 * Endothermic Fire Pit (low)- "There should be some wood around here somewhere."
 * Endothermic Fire Pit (embers)- "I should go chop some wood for that, eh?"
 * Endothermic Fire Pit (out)- "If only I had some wood."
 * Moggles- "Now featuring night-time chopping!"

TabSurvival.pngval

 * Pretty Parasol- "This will keep my beard moderately dry, eh?"
 * Thermal Stone (hot)- "I could chop all winter with that in my pocket!"
 * Thermal Stone (warm)- "It's getting a bit... medium."
 * Thermal Stone- "We call those 'night rocks' back home."
 * Thermal Stone (cold)- "It's gone cold, eh?"
 * Thermal Stone (frozen)- "Brrr! It's frozen."
 * Luxury Fan- "A traditional Canadian fan."
 * Insulated Pack- "Good for long hikes."

TabFood.png

 * Drying Rack (burnt)- "Its usefulness has dried up."
 * Basic Farm and Improved Farm (burnt)- "If it was a tree farm, I'd be sad."
 * Crock Pot (burnt)- "Burned to a crisp."
 * Bucket-o-Poop- "Poop belongs in a bucket, not on the ground."

TabScience.pngce

 * Science Machine (burnt)- "How did it get burned?!"
 * Alchemy Engine (burnt)- "Well, it obeys some basic laws of physics."
 * Winterometer (burnt)- "The ones from home don't burn."
 * Rainometer (burnt)- "Its knowledge of rain didn't keep it from being burned."
 * Electrical Doodad- "I don't even begin to understand how this thing works."

TabFight.png

 * Morning Star- "That's might nifty."
 * Weather Pain- "I prefer to chop the trees myself."
 * Scalemail- "Plaid is all the armour I need."

TabStructures.pngtures

 * Ice Flingomatic (turned off)- "Lazy thing."
 * Ice Flingomatic (turned on)- "Save the trees!"
 * Ice Flingomatic (low fuel)- "It craves wood."
 * Siesta Lean-to- "Naps are important during a long day of chopping."
 * Siesta Lean-to (can't sleep)- "I prefer to siesta between chopping sessions, not at night."
 * Siesta Lean-to (hungry)- "My belly is rumbling. I'd never be able to relax."
 * Siesta Lean-to (danger)- "Can't siesta, something chasing me."
 * Siesta Lean-to (in cave)- "I prefer to siesta between chopping sessions, not at night."
 * Siesta Lean-to (burnt)- "It's a husk."
 * Chest (burnt)- "Wood does have a downside, though..."
 * Pig House (burnt)- "A mere shell of its former glory."
 * Rabbit House (burnt)- "Is it roasted carrot flavoured?"
 * Bee Box (burnt)- "No, not the bees!"
 * Sign (burnt)- "Wood is the best at burning."
 * Scaled Chest- "Gaudy if you ask me."

Wooden_Flooring.png

 * Deciduous Turf- "Just some ground, eh?"
 * Sandy Turf- "It's a... thing."

TabMagic.png

 * Old Bell- "I'm amazed it makes such a crisp sound."

TabDress.png

 * Cat Cap- "Traditional garb of a woodsman."
 * Eyebrella- "Always good to have something watching over you."
 * Fashion Melon- "You can call me Mr. Melon."
 * Floral Shirt- "I really prefer plaid."
 * Hibearnation Vest- "Now this is some proper winter gear."
 * Ice Cube- "I could chop this if I had to."
 * Rain Coat- "For chopping in the rain."
 * Rain Hat- "Always keep a dry head while chopping."
 * Summer Frest- "I'm still not convinced plaid isn't all-weather wear."

Totally_Normal_Tree.pnge - Plants

 * Birchnut Tree- "It's calling to me!"
 * Birchnut Tree (chopped)- "Ahhhh!"
 * Birchnut Tree (burning)- "Nooo! I could have chopped it!"
 * Birchnut Tree (burnt)- "What a waste."
 * Birchnut- "I should grow it and then chop it down."
 * Cactus- "That's gonna hurt."
 * Cactus (picked)- "It certainly did."
 * Grass(withered)- "Maybe it'd thrive it if was cooler."

Harp_Statue.pnge - Objects

 * Catcoon Tail- "The end of that cat's tale."
 * Glommer's Statue- "That's a curious statue, eh?"
 * Glommer's Flower- "Even the flower is slimy."
 * Glommer's Flower(dead)- "Dead and still slimy."
 * Hollow Stump- "Ugh, how many more lives do you have?"
 * Hollow stump (empty)- "Good riddance."
 * Mini Glacier- "Home sweet home."
 * Mini Glacier (melted)- "Back home, they never melt."
 * Molehill- "I bet it's just a pile of rocks inside."
 * Rabbit Hole(spring)- "Nothing going in or out."
 * Tumbleweed- "I wish it was sturdier so I could chop it."

Spider.png - Monsters

 * Birchnutter- "I'll chop you too!"
 * Poison Birchnut Tree- "You're due for a chopping."
 * Varg (Warg)- "That thing could pull a sled by its lonesome."

Pig.png - Neutral Animals

 * Bigfoot- "Watch where you're stepping!"
 * Buzzard- "Stay away from my meat snacks!"
 * Catcoon- "Pests"
 * Volt Goat- "That's a nice pair of horns you've got there."
 * Volt Goat(charged)- "Nice goat, nice goat!"

Rabbit.png - Passive Animals

 * Glommer- "Keep flapping, little guy!"
 * Moleworm- "It feels about rocks the way I feel about trees."
 * Moleworm(holding)- "Want some rocks?"
 * Moleworm(underground)- "Dig, dig, dig."

Treeguard.png - Bosses

 * Moose/Goose- "Whatever it is, it's definetly Canadian."
 * Moose/Goose Egg- "Well, it lays eggs, apparently."
 * Mosling- "Feathery moose baby!"
 * Dragonfly- "He will burn all the trees before I can chop them!"
 * Lavaspit(Hot)- "Aaaah! Tree killer!"
 * Lavaspit(Cool)- "My trees are safe now."
 * Bearger- "That's a big bear!"

Dragon_Fruit.png - Fruits

 * Watermelon- "How can it be both water and melon?"
 * Grilled Watermelon- "I'm not sure about grilled fruit..."
 * Watermelon Seeds- "It's a seed."

Carrot.png - Vegetables

 * Roasted Birchnut- "What a waste of a perfectly good tree."
 * Cactus Flesh- "Would you put nails in your mouth?"
 * Cooked Cactus Flesh- "Much better."
 * Cactus Flower- "It's a wonder anything grows in this climate at all."

Ratatouille.png - Crock Pot

 * Flowersalad- "Healthy, but not very hardy."
 * Icecream- "Only after I've chopped enough!"
 * Watermelonicle- "Wood AND food?!"
 * Trailmix- "The perfect snack for a day of chopping."
 * Hotchili- "Good after a long day of chopping in the cold."
 * Guacamole- "I'm not sure I trust it."

Rot.png - Other

 * Electric Milk- "I think the electricity curdled it."
 * Ice- "A reminder of home for my pocket."
 * Glommer's Goop- "Yep, his slime is slimy too."

Trinkets.png Items

 * Webber's Skull- "The skull gives me the willies, too."
 * Glommer Wings- "Unsurprisingly, the wings are slimy."
 * Volt Goat Horn- "Your horn is mine."
 * Down Feather- "Pillowy plumage."
 * Scales- "I still don't believe in dragons."
 * Thick Fur- "It's as thick as my head!"
 * Bone Shards- "I wish I knew how to make bread."

Gramophone.pngncements

 * Overheating- "It's so hot out here!"
 * Trying to sleep on fire- "Not sure that's entirely safe."
 * Trying to siesta with monsters- "Can't siesta, something chasing me."
 * Trying to siesta at night- "I prefer to siesta between sessions, not at night."
 * Trying to siesta while hungry- "My belly is rumbling. I'd never be able to relax."
 * Taking shelter from rain under tree- "I won't chop you down immediately as thanks for the shelter."
 * [OBJECT] burt- "Ouch, that's hot!"
 * [TOOL] slips from hand- "The stuff of nightmares!"
 * When damp- "It's a curse of water."
 * When wet- "Plaid's warm, even when wet."
 * When really wet- "I'm getting quite wet, eh?"
 * When soaked- "Better hold on tight to Lucy."

Trivia

 * Woodie's examination quote for Monster Lasagna is a reference to the comic strip Garfield, where the main character is a feline whose favorite food is Lasagna.
 * Woodie's quote on Lucy is a reference to the famous sitcom, I love Lucy.
 * When examining a Spider Den, Woodie (who is Canadian) will say, "Holy Mackinaw! Look at that thing!" This is a reference to the catchphrase of Canadian sportscaster Joe Bowen.
 * Woodie's examination quote for Rot is a reference to John Diefenbaker, Canada's 13th Prime Minister.
 * Woodie's examination quote for the burnt Science Machine in RoG ("How did it get burned?!") May be a reference to "The Wickerman" where when examining a burnt doll, the main protagonist yells "HOW'D IT GET BURNED?!"